


Hunter's Moon

by Mythicamagic



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Angst, Attempted Sexual Assault, Biting, Claiming Bites, Demons, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Knotting, Loneliness, Mates, Pining, Romance, Sesshoumaru is still a demon, Violence, Werewolf Kagome, Werewolf Sex, Werewolf Turning, Werewolves in Heat, Wolf Instincts, features fic art, female werewolf - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:22:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 31,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27264190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythicamagic/pseuds/Mythicamagic
Summary: Sesshoumaru lives an isolated life at a cabin in the mountains. One Halloween night, he has a bloody encounter with a werewolf. In the morning he finds that they've transformed into a wounded human woman. She asks for help with controlling her werewolf curse. Touch starved and jaded, he must resist the beckoning call for 'pack' that Kagome unknowingly invites with her clumsy instincts.Made for the Sesskag Monthly Prompt: Fear
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/Sesshoumaru
Comments: 99
Kudos: 406





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HeraldsRest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeraldsRest/gifts).



> AN: Happy (early) Halloween! This fic is dedicated to Chocochip03/CookieAsylum (or HeraldsRest as they're known here), who made some beautiful drawings for this fic as a collab while I did the writing! Lookit all the lovely sesskag pictures! Thank you so much for making them bud!  
> Check them out on tumblr: https://cookieasylum.tumblr.com/
> 
> Warning: this fic features a lot of werewolf tropes. That includes werewolf smut, you have been warned. (It's not a huge aspect of the fic, in fact, this one is more of a hurt/comfort and drama but still)

Throwing logs onto a waning fire and adjusting them with a metal poker, golden eyes began to brighten in time with glowing flames climbing higher. Sesshoumaru warmed his hands, glancing at the darkened window.

This particular Halloween threatened to chill the flesh on his bones, not unusual for that time of year in the mountains. Unlike previous ones, however, a full moon hung within a starless sky, almost as if the night endeavoured to be as standard as possible for All Hallow's Eve. Sitting back on his heels and rising, Sesshoumaru picked up his lukewarm coffee and retook his dogeared seat by a bookshelf. Everything lay silent within his home, save for an occasional crackle of wood caving in on itself in the fireplace, devoured by dancing orange flames.

Sesshoumaru sipped his coffee, drowning in the quiet. He figured little brats would be out at this time bothering neighbours for candy. Luckily he lived in a remote location, far from any village or town. His eyes slid to the wooden door of his cabin.

It wasn't like he… _wanted_ to be bothered. Far from it, he'd always found his own company to be superior to most. Mortals were so loud.

And yet he felt strange. A restlessness lingered in his bones that wasn't usually there. Setting down his still unfinished coffee and crossing the length of his cabin, he stared out unblinkingly at the moon drenched landscape beyond his window. Trees stood eerily still, leaves dyed black. Hills appeared to roll in haphazard directions from large shadows.

Frowning upon realising how tense his muscles had grown, Sesshoumaru shook himself.

_Ridiculous._

He was the previous Lord of the West. The Killing Perfection! He feared nothing. How ludicrous to suggest otherwise. Storming away as if to prove this and fully intent on walking outside and showing his silly, dusty senses that nothing ominous lurked between the trees, his hand stopped inches from a rusted door handle.

A long, drawling howl reached his hearing. Close. Not far from the cabin.

Hair pricked at the back of his neck. Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed red.

That was not a wolf. Or rather, not a typical one. He could hear a faint underlying cry of a human mixed into the mournful noise.

Grasping the door handle and pulling, he stepped out into chilled air, feeling it bite pale skin. Exhaling a visible breath and staring out into vast, unending wilderness, old instincts began to shake their cobwebs loose. Sesshoumaru closed the door behind him and exhaled through his nose, sniffing.

Various scents filled awakening senses. Grass, berries, trees, pine needles, dirt, animal faeces, water- no, he needed flesh and blood. He focused more intently. Deer, rabbits, foxes, squirrels, owls, birds sleeping in the high branches filled his nostrils. All were unique and eliciting a distinct phantom flavour onto his tongue. Then a fusty scent hit him.

Wolf.

He frowned. _Not quite…_

Again, it was strange. A woman's scent tinged the earthy smell, fruity, fresh and pleasing.

A twig snapped, and Sesshoumaru lurched, bursting into a run.

He could hear her, panting, bursting through the trees. Fur brushed leaves. Paws thundered over damp earth, kicking up dirt. Her scent was everywhere, clogging his nose, rain-drenched yet sweet, and he suddenly couldn't locate the female within the dense forest, running blind. A dark figure lunged in close then, black as night- growling and snapping large jaws. He had to rear back lest the beast bite into his shoulder and tear a chunk loose. Sesshoumaru planted his feet and bellowed out a guttural snarl, slashing sharp claws. The creature jumped back before they made contact, looping into dense undergrowth again.

Sesshoumaru panted, waiting and watching. Low snarling came again, resting at a low simmer from behind the safety of the trees now. He could hear her prowling, stalking around him unseen in a circle. A shock of two blue eyes caught his attention within heavy shadow, icy in their stare, and yet their colour plunged deep and exotic like a lagoon.

The creature slinked closer, trotting out from behind a bush as though peeling off from the main cluster of darkness. She stood tall and lanky, with unnaturally long legs- her appearance signalling that this was no ordinary wolf, just as her scent had implied. Instead, she resembled a maned wolf- hackles thick and raised atop her neck, running along pronounced shoulder blades. And yet the shape of her was off even still- a wrongness in her gait of wide strides that allowed her to cross distances eerily quick, her paws a little too long, sometimes resembling hands with the trick of the light- ribcage and figure sinuous, making him think of a human woman. And those _eyes._

They stared with visible emotion. Thunderous growling rolled out between them in the clearing- her lips peeling back to reveal spittle coated teeth.

Sesshoumaru readied himself, pointed ears keen, skin beading with sweat as magenta markings became jagged and bold. It had been many years since his last fight.

He took a steadying breath just as her four legs pushed off, jaws spread wide and saliva flicking into the air. Her attack was ridiculously feral in its raw power and yet indicative of her youth and inexperience to pounce head-on with nothing but a bite planned. Golden eyes smiled, and Sesshoumaru snapped two hands out, catching the creature under her jaw and pushing up to rear her head back. His second hand made a fist in the thick strands of her neck, before he sank white fangs into inky black fur, finding purchase in flesh and biting _down._

A whimper deafened his hearing, the creature scrambling wildly now, having underestimated her foe. Sesshoumaru released her with a bloodied mouth and tossed her away to the ground- but the female foolishly sprang back at him in retaliation. Giving a huff, he lunged straight for her, colliding with the she-wolf. They landed hard and began to roll in a tangle of demon and animal limbs, biting and clawing savagely at each other, twin noises of outrage reaching his ears, fur and blood being shed like confetti.

The scuffle lasted a few moments before Sesshoumaru slammed a palm down to end their senseless quarrel. Her head collided against a rock, knocking the female out cold.

Panting wildly with the copper taste of blood coating his tongue, Sesshoumaru swallowed and sniffed, picking up her steady pulse.

 _Good_ , he hadn't wanted to kill her and yet her stupidity had been sending them careening towards that outcome.

As Sesshoumaru stood, panting and bleeding, claw marks having dragged over his chest and torn his shirt and pants, he looked down at the odd creature.

Golden eyes roved curiously over lithe and lean muscles, before leaning down and gathering her into his arms. The wolf was massive and cumbersome, but his strength allowed him to pad from their impromptu battlefield and back towards his cabin easily.

Setting her down within his toolshed and making note of her injuries, Sesshoumaru left her be to inspect his own wounds, feeling no obligation to tend to her.

The bites were deep and contained an invasive feeling. Foreign, as though they willed an injection of some unknown substance to enter his bloodstream. Sesshoumaru repelled it, expelling the odd, infection-like feeling via acid dripping from his nails. Whatever it had been, rabies or a disease of some sort, Sesshoumaru would not fall prey to it as she had.

Coiling youki out to run along his body and begin rapidly healing sizable bite marks and scratches, he dozed to replenish his strength and only roused a few hours later upon noticing faint streaks of orange and pink on the horizon. Sunrise already.

Mild discomfort settled within his gut at his own inaction, so carrying bandages and other items to treat her wounds- along with a blanket slung over one arm- Sesshoumaru tiredly padded out from the fading warmth of his cabin, the fire having long snuffed itself out.

He winced when the glare of the early morning sun hit his eyes, causing a second lid to slide over them like a thin film. He then blinked rapidly to allow his sight to adjust, continuing on to his shed- only to freeze within its threshold. Perhaps a single glance at the sun had damaged his retinas for good.

A woman.

A woman now lay where he'd set the creature down a few hours ago. Her body was sprawled naked and shivering, rich dark hair lying strewn around frosted ground. Blue eyes had slid open, and she quickly sat up, clutching trembling arms close to her chest.

Though her scent had become sour with fear, flecks of blood from her head injury causing black locks to become matted- arms, legs and torso quivering, littered with scratches and bites- she gazed up at him with an unexpected amount of regret.

"I-I'm sorry," she breathed, brows drawing together worriedly. "You're not hurt too badly, are you?"

* * *

Sesshoumaru had stared blankly for a moment, deciding the blue tint to her fingers were more important than answering. Throwing the blanket around her, he'd lifted the squirming woman into his arms, carrying her inside.

After rejuvenating the fire and urging her to sit in front of the flames, he piled yet more blankets around her shoulders- stilling when she grabbed his striped wrist.

 _Shit_ , his markings. His long white hair, his eyes-

Well, maybe it didn't matter, considering her secret.

"M-my name's Kagome. What's y-yours?" she asked, teeth chattering.

"Sesshoumaru," he said in a voice thin with disuse. He cleared his throat. "I am Sesshoumaru. Why, pray tell, did you attack me last night?"

"I really do apologise for that! You see I uh…lose control of myself. I guess it's pretty obvious I have a werewolf curse. Sounds impossible I know, but since you saw me there's no denying it, right? I got bitten two months ago and I'm having trouble with it," she sighed, suddenly stiffening. "I didn't bite you, did I?! Oh God, I think I did!"

Sesshoumaru cut his eyes to the ceiling and pushed back his tattered shirt sleeve, pale skin sporting a bite mark. "Your meagre curse cannot affect this one. Cease your fretting."

Blue eyes blinked rapidly while she adjusted the blankets, knees drawing up. "O-oh…is that because you have your own curse?"

"No."

"But you smell…dog-ish."

"And you smell wolf-ish but you are not a wolf. I am inuyoukai. I was born a dog demon. Do not compare them."

Kagome nodded slowly, "fair enough…"

The demon rose to prepare some tea using a woodstove, the fire bringing clean water to a boil. After placing a steaming mug in her frozen hands, inquisitive fingers peeled back the blanket covering her shoulder.

Kagome jolted, growling. "What are you doing?"

His gaze turned flat, "checking your injuries. It appears you heal quickly."

She rubbed at his bite mark laying upon the delicate flesh of her neck, tucking his blanket tighter around herself warily. "Some heal quicker than others. What was with that bite, anyway? You have some serious jaw strength."

Sesshoumaru sat at a respectable distance, nursing his drink. "I was attempting to show you your place and the difference in our power. It would have been wiser to back down from that fight," he pointed out dryly, ignoring her grumble. "More importantly, girl, where is your family?"

Kagome stiffened, drawing in on herself and staring at the fire, letting out a long exhale. "In Tokyo. Ran away from home, in case that wasn't obvious. I'd rather not talk about it."

Melancholy flitted into her fusty, yet sweet scent. Sesshoumaru quietly observed her, attention straying over the cover concealing her frame and remembering how skinny she'd looked.

They fell into silence for a time, until he rose once more and gathered some clothes, tossing them to the floor beside her.

"These will be ill-fitting but the belt may help. Rest if you wish. By the time I have awoken, I expect you to be gone."

Kagome stared up at him, before getting to her feet shakily. She stood a good head shorter than he, but the fire curling within sparking blue eyes almost seemed to make up for any difference in height.

"No."

Sesshoumaru arched a brow, lips curving into a mocking smile. "No? You think I cannot remove you from my presence?"

"You could, but I'd continue to annoy you," came her confident, unabashed response. "You're the only person I've met that smells somewhat like me. Sure you might be living alone away from humans but I could feel the control you have over yourself even when we fought. _Please_ , I'm begging you. Teach me how to stifle this curse so that I can live like a normal person again. This isn't like a once a moon problem. These...instincts are constant. I humbly ask for any assistance."

She ducked her head down into a low bow, the blanket drooping to expose the tempting nape of her neck.

Heat churned low in his gut, and Sesshoumaru had to look away. "This one is under no obligation to help you."

Kagome raised her head, "maybe not, but I'd be in your debt. I'll cook, I'll clean! I'll do anything, just please-" she caught the back of his shirt when he turned, causing him to freeze and lock a burning golden gaze onto the female. She stared back defiantly, soon lowering her eyes, shame colouring her voice. "I-I…" Kagome wet full lips and took a breath. "I killed someone. During my transformation. I never want to hurt anyone ever again, the idea terrifies me."

Sesshoumaru watched her expression harden with resolve. "What do you want in exchange for teaching me? I don't have any money but I could get a job once I've got better control and wire the wages into your account-"

"I am uninterested in money."

Kagome set her jaw and took a breath, soon curling both hands into the blanket- tossing it back from her shoulders. It fluttered to the floor with a gentle noise.

Sesshoumaru cast his gaze down her willowy frame languidly.

Her skin pricked with exposure to the elements, breasts perky, nipples hardening from chilled air. Firelight caught her hair, setting a few of the tousled waves into a midnight blue against the deep black of the rest. She held traces of dirt and blood upon goosebumped flesh, her thighs well muscled and inviting. She was scantily furred, as he noticed only a mere patch of dark hair between her legs. He could sense her virginity.

"You would go so far as to offer yourself to me?" Sesshoumaru muttered, raising his attention to her hard eyes.

She nodded without hesitation. "If that's what it takes to save people."

An interesting response, certainly. Wintery lashes lowered a touch, the demon leaning down and sensing tension coil tight in her muscles. Nonetheless, she forced herself to keep standing still. His nose skimmed hers, face looming close. Their breaths intermingled.

Gold eyes slid shut. "You will leave before I have awoken," he uttered softly, pulling back and walking away.

Stopping at the bottom of his wooden stairs, he rested a hand on the metal rail.

"This one is not completely unsympathetic towards your plight. However, I am not the right person to teach you. There are other demons. Scarce, but they are out there. Some are wolves like you. Seek them out instead."

With that said, he climbed the stairs, leaving her alone within the living room.

* * *

Laying in bed and squinting at his ceiling while his curtains failed to shield sensitive eyes to the morning light, Sesshoumaru strained his hearing for several hours, assuming she'd fallen asleep.

He wondered if she were hungry. The skin had been taut around her ribs- _no._ He forced his eyes shut. _Do not feed her._ _She'll just come back. Do not._

To feed a being was to take responsibility for it.

With these annoying thoughts spiralling around within his head, Sesshoumaru fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

Waking to the delicious smell of cooked meat, his lungs expanded with a long inhale. Saliva pooled within his mouth. Rising and padding down to the kitchen with rumpled clothes and hair, he blinked blearily.

She stood with her back turned to him, clad in an oversized plaid shirt he'd given her. It fell to lush thighs, toned legs bare. Apparently she'd forgone the offered pants but made use of his belt, treating it more like a fashion accessory around her slim waist.

His expression tightened. It looked good on her.

Kagome flashed an amiable smile over her shoulder. "Good morning!" she chirped, meat sizzling on the woodstove. "You don't seem to have much variety in the pantry other than meat so I guess this will have to do? Want tea, coffee or water?"

Thin lips pressed into a grim line. "...Coffee," he grunted, taking a seat at his table.

"Rodger," humming, she navigated around his kitchen with ease, grabbing a mug. "How do you even have so much coffee if you're in such a remote location?"

"Occasionally it is necessary to drive to the nearest village. I stock up on what I need there," Sesshoumaru turned in his seat as she passed, mapping her with his eyes. Black hair had been tied back into a ponytail that swayed with each movement.

The second she'd set down their drinks and breakfast, sitting opposite him with an easy smile, he cut to the chase; "you are supposed to be gone," he reminded her, just in case she'd forgotten.

"I know," she assured him breezily.

Sesshoumaru stared as she tucked into her meal, making a pleasured groan. "Mnn, what is this?"

"Squirrel," he said bluntly, causing a repressed choking fit. "I will force you out if need be, girl."

Kagome thumped her chest, coughing into her hand and blinking back tears, swallowing. "S-sure, we'll get around to that eventually."

Somehow he doubted she'd go quietly. What a pest.

"By the way, I'd appreciate it if you stop calling me 'girl'. I'm 23, not 10."

He arched a brow. So her immaturity came from her personality, not her age. _That bodes well._

"So I was wondering; what do you do all day up here in the hills?" she piped up again after taking a gulp of her beverage.

"This one either hunts or gathers wood for the fire. The house occasionally needs to be tended to, along with my vehicle. Sometimes I will read or go for long walks around the-" he noticed her watching him with a strange expression. "What?"

"It just sounds a little lonely," Kagome said, lightly blowing the steam curling from her mug.

Sesshoumaru's lips thinned, gaze following her line of sight out of the kitchen window. Some birds bathed in a puddle, playing together. It must have rained during his nap. "I think the hardest part of leaving home and travelling on my own has been the loneliness," her eyes gentled.

Sharp claws twitched, his chest constricting slightly. He rose abruptly, not wanting to confront such a feeling.

"Ah, was it something I said?"

"No," Sesshoumaru uttered, teeth grinding at the distress he'd caused in her scent. "I do not like cooked meat. I will hunt alone. This time, you will leave by the time I have returned or I will drive you to the nearest village myself."

Striding away from the conversation and changing clothes within his bedroom, the demon wasted no time in making good on his claim and walking into the forest. In truth, he could tolerate cooked meat, and he'd surely wasted breakfast. However, waste was a small price to pay. He couldn't afford to start sympathising too much. The repressed longing for pack had been something he'd been able to shove under the rubble with everyday routine and strict discipline. This... _woman_ proved to be complicating things already with her mere existence.

Indeed she proved so distracting and bothersome, the apex predator found himself ridiculously clumsy in trying to catch prey. His steps were too loud, jumps timed just a tad off, as though his heart weren't really in it.

Sesshoumaru snorted and straightened, panting a little as the deer intended for breakfast ran off into the gloom of misty trees. _Annoying._

Wiping some dirt off his pants, he started to head back towards the cabin again. At least she wouldn't be there to see him return empty-handed. Thankfully he did not sense her within the house upon nearing it. However…

He stopped, keen ears picking up the sound of feet pounding over grass.

Pointed ears perked and Sesshoumaru turned his head, only to jolt. A rabbit ran for its life in a clearing not too far away from the house- the woman giving chase, a somewhat desperate look on her face. He noted that despite the lack of full moon her legs seemed to morph just a tad. Kagome bowed forward suddenly, bounding unnaturally on four legs, her arms having elongated to accommodate her. Letting out a yip and leaping, she sailed towards the rabbit, hands skimming it's brown fur- before it abruptly lurched upwards from her hold and slipped out of her grasp, bounding off into dense undergrowth. Kagome landed hard on her stomach, kicking up dirt.

Sesshoumaru arched a brow. Apparently, they were both a mess today, in more ways than one. This was getting ridiculous. They could both be adults about this. There was nothing to fear. Sighing and coming to a grim conclusion, Sesshoumaru steeled himself and approached.

Her ear twitched when a foot dragged deliberately over the earth, and she quickly sat up, the front half of his shirt now littered with dirt. She gave an awkward, embarrassed grin.

"Ahaha…hi. I um… wanted to apologise by catching you something. As you can see I kinda suck at it."

"Hn," he readily agreed, causing her to huff.

"So where's your kill-"

"This one has decided you may remain here."

Kagome gawked, standing. "R-really?"

"Indeed, though you will leave as soon as you're able. I will teach you control if only to rid myself of you faster."

Kagome didn't seem bothered by the snub, bowing a touch. "Thank you so much for letting me stay, but what brought this on?"

Honestly, he felt a mix of things. Mildly touched she'd try to hunt for him despite his rejection, and… another reason. Pride. This cowardly feeling of running away from her did not suit him. She was a mere slip of a woman. She was of no danger to him, and he'd prove it by welcoming her graciously into his home and resisting those tempting thighs.

A hand was abruptly waved in front of his face. "Hello? You kind of went all quiet and stared at my legs for a while. Everything OK?"

He jerked. "Fine."

"Well good, but can we stop pretending like we both don't really, _really_ need a bath after last night? I could use about three," she giggled. The sound was melodic and pretty.

Sesshoumaru shook himself. "There is a waterfall just East of here."

Kagome stared, features giving way to horror. "N-no tub?"

Golden eyes flattened, "it takes a long time to heat enough water for a bath."

"It's almost winter," she pointed out thinly, quelling under his palpable annoyance. "Oh alright, grumpy. I was just hoping I wouldn't have to jump in a river again," she grumbled, following him into the house to grab some towels out of a dilapidated wardrobe. Folding them over one arm and accepting another shirt, she looked up at him with big blue eyes.

Her nostrils flared, and Sesshoumaru was about to inquire what she'd sensed before gentle fingers touched his wrist. A thin red line marred pale skin, a cut, probably caused by the brush of a thorn when he'd been hunting.

All attention zeroed in on Kagome's lips when they parted. She bent her head down, hot breath fanning over sensitive, pricking flesh. Sesshoumaru's slit pupils dilated. He watched, enraptured as a pink tongue slid out to drag in a soft wet graze over the super life-threatening wound. He became hyperaware of his heartbeat resounding ridiculously loud in his ears. She didn't even seem aware of what she was doing. Yet again she'd given in to instinct. When she raised her head slightly, Kagome blinked owlishly- jerking back with a crimson face.

"A-ah! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to- ohh that was so creepy of me! Why did I do that?" she groaned, burying her face in her hands. Good. That way she didn't see his expression. Sesshoumaru turned away, clearing his throat and grabbing something from the wardrobe.

"It was a mere instinct to clean my wound, it is nothing to fuss over," he muttered as though to remind himself as well.

"Here, soap," throwing a bar over his shoulder, he heard a squawk and rush to catch it.

"You don't uh… have any shampoo or conditioner?" Kagome chanced weakly.

Sesshoumaru glanced at her other one shoulder and brushed a hand through long silver locks that were secured at the back of his neck in a low ponytail, his usual style these days. The condition remained glossy and perfect. "You do not need it," he uttered.

"I'm pretty sure I do but I'll take your word for it," Kagome hummed, brushing by and causing his body to stiffen. Damn her.

She glanced innocently over one shoulder. "I've noticed that you're kind of… tense around me but I hope we can get along. Thanks again for letting me stay, it means the world to me."

With that said, she flounced out of the room, black locks bouncing from eager steps. Sesshoumaru released a breath and massaged his temples.

This proved to be… strenuous. But the faster he taught her what she needed to know, the faster he'd be rid of her.

* * *

After bathing in his own area and hearing a distant shriek and intense cursing at the water's temperature from the woman, Sesshoumaru returned home, youki coiling around him like a warm summer breeze to dry his hair. Kagome stomped in miserably, looking like a drowned rat and towel drying her hair roughly, though she gave no verbal complaints.

Deciding to get their first lesson over with, Sesshoumaru called her out onto his wooden porch, levelling his attention at the far off trees.

"Do you hear it?"

"Hear what?" she tilted her head, resting the towel around her shoulders.

"Focus."

Kagome closed her eyes and seemed to listen intently. Sesshoumaru shifted, flicking a small pebble out from his hand with a jerk of his thumb that sent it sailing away towards the left side trees. As he'd expected- the second stone made contact with wood, Kagome's ears changed, morphing into black triangular ones jutting up atop her head. They swivelled to the left slightly and she blinked confused blue eyes open.

"Something hit the trees on the left," she said, wolf ears pricking.

"Hn," his tone bordered on amused. "You cheated."

She gaped, "I did not! How can you cheat just by listening?"

Reaching up, he grasped one of the velvety ears between forefinger and thumb, eliciting a gasp. "You relied on your wolf hearing. When you try hard at something or enjoy yourself it appears you lose focus, and this is when your body morphs."

Kagome groaned, touching the ears gingerly when he released her. "This is weird, ah- my regular ears have vanished!" She touched the sides of her face in distress. "That's so _creepy!_ "

Sesshoumaru huffed but paused upon sensing her mounting unease. Lifting his palms, he smoothed them down over her head, "change back," he uttered. The soft ears disappeared back into her skull, and Kagome made a noise of relief. She tilted her head up to look at him, rounded ears back.

"Your voice…" Kagome mumbled. "It changed just now. It felt like a command."

Sesshoumaru quickly removed his hands as though burned, lips thinning. The will of the alpha in a pack. Was that what he'd accidentally forced upon her?

Kagome shook herself and turned back to the trees. "Let's try again."

* * *

The listening exercise proved to him that the woman needed more than just control during the full moon. Her everyday life was impacted by how she'd unknowingly morph her body for small tasks. On top of that, there were her instincts to take into account. She couldn't start licking strangers just because they were injured.

He had his work cut out for him.

That night after gathering firewood together and eating, Sesshoumaru brought up a pile of furs from the basement he usually saved for winter when the truly cold weather hit.

Kagome sat before the fireplace, reading. She cocked her head slightly when he set them down.

"You may sleep here," he pointed graciously at them.

Kagome arched a brow. "Um… okay? Why do you have so many?"

"It gets cold," he pointed out bluntly.

"Yeah but… couldn't you just sleep in your other form? You don't need a moon to transform if you were born an inuyoukai, right? Come to think of it, why didn't you change during our fight?"

His body had grown stiff. Stern features became removed and placid, guard firmly up. Kagome fell quiet as he inclined his head.

"I do not change into my true form anymore. I will not ask you about your family, as per your request. In return, you do not ask about this, understood?"

Kagome nodded slowly, worry knitting her brows. Sesshoumaru pivoted on his heel and bid her goodnight.

* * *

Light fell upon magenta lids. Pale lashes fluttered, squeezing shut, and he turned his head to escape from the invasive sun urging him to rise, burying his nose in his sublime smelling pillow. So very soft. Shifting, Sesshoumaru frowned slightly. His covers felt very solid and warm bundled in his arms, curves pressing against his chest. A content noise was rumbling out from his throat and _holy shit was he purring?_

A dreamy, warm sigh fanned out close to his ear. Golden eyes snapped open.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: This fic will have five or six chapters, depending on if I make the epilogue a separate chapter. Happy Halloween! Plz handwave any incorrect information about blackberry season, I'm aware they're mostly a thing in September not November, thaaanks.

Kagome lay atop his chest, knee hitched and leg thrown over one of his hips uncaringly. He spied his own large hand resting traitorously on that leg- and wondered who had adjusted it to fall over him. The position left her crotch pressing intimately against his- and Sesshoumaru stiffened, hissing out a low noise. Morning wood hadn't been something he'd had to deal with in a while. How fantastic it had happened _now_ of all times.

His head hit the pillow, trying to ignore how good she felt in his arms. He needed to move her off as soon as possible. How dare she cuddle up to him in the night without permission? Still...he took note of their positions. Her head was tucked under his chin to protect his throat. A defensive move usually reserved for a female shielding her mate from danger. In a way, it was in keeping her nature.

He blew out a puff of hot hair, causing dark locks to dance and fall- tickling his aristocratic nose.

Kagome stirred, yawning.

"Good morning," her voice ran up his spine, a soothing hand of rich, husky tones.

Despite the hints of dark circles under his eyes, the intensity of liquid gold did not lessen. They were bright and burning into hers when she lifted her head. Inhaling, his stomach tightened, no doubt nauseous from the scent of her. It was sweetly musky, smoky, _gripping._

How could she greet him without a trace of shame?

"Hn," he gestured to their positions. "What are you doing in my bed, woman?"

Kagome blinked, soon wrenching herself out of her dreamy state and sitting up- accidentally straddling him and yelping when the position nestled his erect cock hard against her covered sex. Thank God she was wearing his boxers. Sesshoumaru groaned and hissed, gripping her hips quickly. Aurous eyes flashed red. "Do not move," he said lowly, tone strained as fangs lengthened.

"I-I take it you don't remember last night?" Kagome breathed, bracing herself over him tensely. He could feel the tension in her thighs locked against him. The sweet torture almost rendered him deaf to her words.

Taking a breath, Sesshoumaru abruptly yanked his body up, rolling them so that she landed on her back with a yelp. Dragging his hips away from hers and letting out a strained exhale, he looked at her blushing face, his own looming close. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Nothing had happened...had it? No, they weren't naked and the smell of sex was thankfully absent from the room.

Kagome seemed to come to a silent conclusion, shaking her head. "Never mind. It was uh...cold? I needed a snuggle buddy. My bad."

"Yes. Your bad," Sesshoumaru grunted. "Do not take it upon yourself to 'snuggle' with me again, woman- or I will not take responsibility for the consequences if my instincts prove insurmountable."

She gave a reluctant nod, quickly averting her eyes when he pulled back with a stifled hiss, sitting on the bed and throwing a cover over the tent in his sleeping pants. Kagome awkwardly scrambled away and hurriedly exclaimed that she'd make breakfast, red-faced as she ducked out of his room.

* * *

Wet leaves coated the forest floor like ruined confetti, soaked into the ground. He slipped out into the trees, eyeing the heavy morning fog and hearing dew-laden grass crunch beneath his boots.

Everything lay silent and still, the perfect Autumn hush.

Loud footsteps came hurriedly following him, Kagome stopping just shy of touching him. "Do you see anything?" she asked excitedly.

Sesshoumaru sighed a plume of visible air. "Can you not read the atmosphere? Do not get too caught up in your emotions," he grumbled. "Adjust your mindset, and become one with the situation. We are hunting."

Kagome huffed and adjusted the grey coat he'd lent her. It looked much too big and cumbersome but she'd sneezed earlier and that was the last thing they needed when hunting deer. Her hiking boots were also several sizes too big so she'd worn five pairs of thick socks to try and help them accommodate her feet.

He continued walking carefully, picking up the natural earthy, fusty scent of deer further ahead. "This goes for human interaction as well. Put your own feelings aside and adapt."

"You say it like it's so easy," she sighed, raising a brow when he gestured for her to take the lead and start tracking.

Her eyes squinted and she obeyed, shuffling ahead. She second-guessed herself often between what could be a deer track and what was a mere blemish in the dirt.

"What exactly have you eaten for the past few months while you were homeless?" he asked bluntly.

"I'm not proud of it but I stole some stuff from food vendors," Kagome made a face. "Other times I went to homeless shelters or begged. When I came into the forest I ate any berries I found that I could recall not being poisonous. Grandpa used to teach me about them," her tone became a touch nostalgic.

Sesshoumaru hummed, patiently following her and grasping her elbow to direct her when she failed to follow a trail correctly. He sensed embarrassment and an odd mix of something unidentified in her scent. Golden eyes flicked up, catching red cheeks.

"Are you still cold?" he uttered.

"No I'm alright, just weird instinct stuff," she waved off.

"If you wish, we could-" a hand was shoved over his mouth.

" _Shh!"_

Kagome stared straight ahead, pupils dilating slightly. Closing her eyes, she inhaled a long breath. When they snapped open again, hunger tinged her voice. "I can smell them nearby."

They hadn't eaten since breakfast, as he'd deliberately tried to coax a touch of desperation out of her. A satisfied belly only made predators lazy.

Sesshoumaru ignored how her palm had brushed his lips and set his nerve endings alight, removing it and noticing something.

"Woman."

"Hm?"

He caught a shaggy black tail mid-wag that was peeping out from beneath the hem of the coat. Kagome jolted.

"O-oh," she focused and touched it, awkwardly guiding it back beneath the coat so that the fur disappeared once again. Sensing a bundle of nerves and eagerness to prove herself skittering about her scent, Sesshoumaru stepped up to her side.

"Do not think of the end result. Take it in stages. What are you going to do first?"

She looked at him, shoulders slowly relaxing. "Approach from downwind?"

"Good, but incorrect," noticing her gaze slip away distractedly to the trees where deer awaited them, he reached out and grasped her chin. Turning it back so that her face was angled up, Kagome snapped blue eyes to his, full attention where it belonged, _on him._

"The first thing to do in any situation where retaining control is paramount is to breathe. It is the most important step," Sesshoumaru uttered in a silky voice he did not intend.

She attempted to nod, but could not due to his grip. Instead, she closed her eyes and took a long inhale, holding it when he instructed- then slowly exhaling.

Releasing her, the Daiyoukai gestured to go on ahead. Kagome gingerly stepped away, brushing a hand absentmindedly over her chin and starting to creep through the trees without him.

Sesshoumaru followed at a distance, observing.

She managed to locate and sneak up on the herd, squatting behind a bush while the deer grazed peacefully in a meadow beneath some willow trees. Removing her much too big boots, Kagome caught his eye.

Nodding, Sesshoumaru slipped closer first. Old instincts awakened with every step, moving soundlessly with all the grace of a jungle cat passing slick as water through tall trees. He had prowled half-way to the herd before he even realised he was moving. His tactics for teaching Kagome in this instance was to prove that she could follow verbal instruction. By doing that and upping her confidence, she could likely be able to take back control and teach herself discipline. Kagome stalked closer just as he'd instructed.

Sesshoumaru then leapt from his hiding place, causing the deer to start with fright and scatter towards Kagome's position.

Letting many of them pass, she held herself still, visibly quaking. Hunger and instincts clashed with orders. Digging toes into the earth, the woman bent her knees, waiting for the right moment. A deer then leapt over a fallen log, passing within range.

Kagome sprang onto it's back, wrapping her arms around its neck. She yelped as she lost balance.

Sesshoumaru watched as their figures disappeared from view into the bushes with a visible tumble. Raising a brow and venturing closer, grass crunched beneath his quickening pace. Pushing aside some thick branches and following her scent, he finally located Kagome, kneeling in a muddy patch before the fallen deer.

Instead of sensing victory, however, plumes of sadness and distress radiated off her in waves. Taking a knee beside her and scattering brown, dead leaves, he slid ageless attention over the deep claw marks that had lashed across the deer's thin brown fur, right over its jugular.

Trembling, bloodied claws rested on Kagome's knees, her head bowed.

"...Woman," he said softly.

She did not respond, so reaching out- he touched a thin shoulder, feeling her start. Wide, tear-filled eyes found him.

Frowning slightly and trying to pinpoint what was wrong, the Daiyoukai brushed wild black locks away from her sallow face. "What ails you?"

"N-nothing," Kagome croaked. "It's just….it felt like hurting him, for a moment. Their eyes, and the horrible noises they made when I..." she trailed off, voice quiet but vivid with emotion.

Sesshoumaru felt a chill run through his chest, like a cold flare illuminating the dark, hollow cavern within his heart. The brief sounds of wails and roaring fires filled his hearing- yet he snuffed them out by grabbing her bloodied hand and standing, tugging her up with him.

"I will carry it back," he uttered. "You may walk ahead."

Nodding miserably, she shakily pulled away to start picking her way back to the trail they'd come from.

"Kagome."

Stopping and glancing back tiredly at him, she blinked.

Sesshoumaru stared after her. Towering words of eloquence and comfort constructed themselves within his mind. A confirmation. An acknowledgement that she was not alone in what she'd just felt, but all that came out was; "You did well."

Her frame seemed to wilt with mild disappointment, a wry chuckle slipping from her lips. "I don't feel like I did," she murmured, turning and continuing to walk on ahead in solitude.

When they finally returned that evening and he skinned and cooked the meat for her, Sesshoumaru breathed out with relief when she began talking again as though nothing had happened. Somehow, her bright, sassy chatter and earnest eyes felt normal, preferable, and maybe even deeply desired in comparison to the dead silence of that return walk home.

* * *

Stirring to sunlight, Sesshoumaru cracked one eye open, finding the view of his bedroom obscured by dark curls. Lifting his head slightly from where it had been nestled into her neck, he frowned down at the slumbering woman. _Again?_

Barking at her sharply to wake and start the day caused Kagome to scramble up, growling a complaint to not to be so loud in the mornings.

After another day of training, he decided to take action. Sesshoumaru turned the metal lock on his bedroom door, satisfied that it would keep her at bay. It wasn't as if she was desperate. He was just some easy warmth to nuzzle up to.

He went to sleep that night and upon waking, looked to his left- then to his right, smirking. No woman.

A peaceful, undisturbed sleep, though his bed still reeked of her fragrance. He'd need to change the-

Sesshoumaru shifted his head back, finding his headboard moving. Breathing.

Jolting upright, and turning, he glared down at the woman he'd been using as a pillow.

_How did she even get in?!_

A courtesy glance at the lock revealed that the door hadn't been busted down. It remained undamaged. Perhaps she'd crawled through his bedroom window after scaling the outside of his cabin?

Endeavouring to try one more time, Sesshoumaru that night fixed a second lock onto his door, bolting it shut. Locking the windows and checking their strength, he stood back with a stern nod and went to bed.

Golden eyes slide open that morning, hearing the steady drum of a heartbeat beneath his ear and quiet breaths causing his head to rise and fall slightly. Sesshoumaru rose from her chest, vague pink dusting his cheeks. Kagome lay beneath him, expression peaceful with sleep. One of her hands was tangled in his hair, which had fallen loose from its tie. Attempting to wrestle it free from lithe fingers in vain, Sesshoumaru groaned and lay beside her with a sigh.

Dark brows drew together and Kagome made a noise, feeling around with a free hand and groping his face before her expression relaxed again. She nuzzled against his chest, breathing in. The corner of her mouth twitched into a happy smile.

Sesshoumaru pinched the bridge of his nose, giving a long exhale while his arm subconsciously curled around her waist.

"You win."

* * *

In light of what had happened with the deer, Kagome seemed to have gained an aversion to meat. That morning she flippantly dismissed his offer of rabbit for breakfast and flounced off with a basket in hand to find berries. It was around two hours later that Sesshoumaru sat at the kitchen table, bouncing his leg and glancing at the clock.

When the door slid open, he immediately stood, taking in the sight of her. Leaves littered dark, wild hair. Purple splatters of juice marring her hands, a few grazes of dirt painting rosy cheeks. Kagome grinned widely, lifting the full basket of blackberries.

"Can we make jam?" she breathed.

"Hn."

Her smile widened. "Do you have sugar?"

"No."

Kagome deflated faster than a balloon. Eyeing her for a moment, Sesshoumaru slid his gaze away. "...I am in need of some new shirts," he fibbed. "Therefore, I will be driving down to the village."

She immediately brightened and dropped the basket to land heavily on the table, throwing her arms around his waist and hugging him for a moment.

"Thanks! Ah- uh...sorry," she pulled away. "I know you're not big on the touching thing."

If she knew that he wondered why she broke into his room every night. Grasping her hands that had no doubt dirtied his shirt, Sesshoumaru hummed. Feeling sticky berry juice clinging to her fingers, he dragged the pad of his thumb over one. Deciding to pay her back for the graze of her tongue a few days ago upon his wound, Sesshoumaru bent down slightly. Giving a long, lingering drag of his slick tongue over frozen digits, he savoured the sweet yet sour bite it ignited onto his taste buds.

Kagome watched him with slack-jawed surprise. He thumbed a trail of juice clinging at the edge of her palm, closing his mouth over it and sucking delicately at the heel- making sure she felt the scrape of sharp fangs, the heat of his mouth. Kagome shivered, thighs pressing together and a spike of intriguing scents filling the air.

_And that is for creeping into my bed without permission._

He fixed a debonair smile onto his thin lips. "I'd advise bathing first, woman."

"Uh-huh," blue eyes remained unfocused for a moment before she blushed and snatched her damp hand away. "P-pervert!" she said without much strength to her voice, hurrying away a little unsteadily.

Sesshoumaru brushed long fingers over his burning mouth. That had been foolish, but he couldn't help but tease her a little. It seemed he was still capable of being playful, even flirtatious.

He'd... forgotten that side of himself.

Watching Kagome scamper away, oversized shirt flitting about her thighs, he wondered what else would be unearthed the more time he spent captive in her presence.

* * *

After prepping his truck for travel, Kagome had complained about the lack of music for the drive down. He vaguely recalled storing some in his basement and sent her off in search of it, not anticipating her return with an armful of cassette tapes. Shoving herself into the passenger seat as the engine sputtered and hummed to life, she huffed.

"Haven't you ever heard of CDs? These are ancient!"

Wrapping long-fingered hands over the steering wheel and starting to follow the dirt track down the mountain path, Sesshoumaru cut his eyes to the ceiling. "My music phase ended a few years ago."

"Your 'music' phase? No, no-" Kagome wrestled with some loose tape. "People have pop phases, emo phases, or hating the colour pink phases- no one _gets over_ music. Isn't your house unbearably quiet without it?"

"Some people like silence," he drawled, lips curving. " _You_ are not one of them."

Kagome groaned as the tape made her hair become static, combing her fingers through puffy locks. "I don't believe you are, either. Gah!" she gave up, eyeing his immaculate hair with envy. "By the way, how do you intend to mix with the humans at the village? Do you just show up in all your pale-haired, golden-eyed glory and tell them you're former yakuza in cosplay?"

The truck weaved around a corner before Sesshoumaru lifted a hand and smoothed it uncaringly through his locks- the colour bleeding black under his touch.

Kagome gaped. "Holy- wow," she breathed. "That's cool."

"It is merely a glamour to disguise me or present my features in a certain way. I cannot make myself taller or bigger," he smirked, slanting a cool gaze her way. "You are capable of it too, to an extent."

"I am?"

"Hn," golden eyes followed the road. "Have you not noticed that despite neglecting to shave your legs, they remain hairless?"

"Yes! I was wondering about that!"

"You have a decent hold on your glamour already that stops you from deviating from the image you have of yourself. I am the same. You stop yourself from looking feral or monstrous through sheer willpower."

Kagome frowned to herself, leaning forward and popping the cassette tape into the player, pressing a button on his radio. "That's interesting. I guess I've never seen you shave either and yet you're always immaculate. Can you give yourself a beard?"

"I will look foolish."

"I promise not to laugh," she swore seriously as music started pouring through aged speakers, a saxophone fairly predominant among the music. Kagome bit the inside of her cheek. "Though I might at your music taste."

Growling, Sesshoumaru pressed the button to make it pop out, shoving in another that sounded like smooth jazz. Passing a hand over his jaw- a five o'clock shadow appeared first, developing into stubble. Kagome hummed with interest, leaning closer to inspect his face. A dark beard appeared to accompany it, and she seemed to swallow her mirth. Touching his jaw, she brushed light fingers over it.

"I think it would need to be styled a certain way to make it work, but you're right, it doesn't suit you. Yet. Maybe try it again when you hit 40."

He rose a brow, touching the hair and forcing it to withdraw back, his face a clean shave once more. "This one is at least 800."

"Okay but physically and emotionally I'd say you're late twenties, early thirties," she waved that off, swaying a little with the music.

Sesshoumaru wondered what that meant. He thought he'd be considered ancient in her youthful eyes. "Am I not 'mature' enough to be considered older?" he sniffed.

"Nope, and you don't act like you're centuries old."

"What would an 800-year-old act like?"

Kagome thought for a moment, snapping her fingers and looking at the passing scenery. "They wouldn't ask questions, and they wouldn't have the same hunger in their eyes as you do."

His throat turned dry. All witty responses collapsed on his tongue. He didn't know what to say. She viewed him so differently to how he viewed himself.

"If you're so committed to this loner act thing you've got going on though, you should get a pet," she was chattering. "Oh! What about a kitty?"

"No," he automatically sneered.

"Come ooon, I'd help you look after it while I'm here," she teased.

"I would not trust you to look after a plant."

Kagome lifted her lips, exposing sharpened teeth in a silent growl. Sesshoumaru shot her a look, rumbling a deeper, very much audible growl.

Her hair raised like her hackles, soon crossing both arms and relenting. "If I successfully care for a plant will you buy yourself a pet?"

Sesshoumaru tsked, "very well. Though, I do not see why it matters to you so much."

Kagome turned dazed attention to the passing, rocky landscape outside, her expression falling in the reflection upon the glass. "I just think you could use the company."

* * *

The scent of humans clustered together hit them like a somnolent haze. Mortals had a particular salty sweat that mingled with their lotions, hair products, food, age, general health and fabric softeners, creating a myriad of smells that blended into one. It could be overwhelming, which was why he was glad this was just a village, not a city. No wonder Kagome had needed to leave Tokyo.

He bristled when a fluffy fan kept batting him in the face, making the truck swerve on the road.

"Woman," he gritted out, nearing the houses.

Kagome was busy leaning out of her passenger side window, hair dancing, swayed by a breeze. She reached out a hand behind her to seize the wagging black tail.

"Sorry!" she called over the wind, not sounding very sorry at all.

They pulled up at a store parking lot, one of the few in the area. Kagome swung herself out of his window, practically vibrating with excitement.

Sesshoumaru eyed her, noting what a poor thing she looked in his oversized shirt and pants she'd been forced to wear for the outing, though she'd tried to tailor them into shorts. Combine this with boots that were much too big and she appeared more a street rat than his...companion. He then spared a look at himself in a store window. The open flannel shirt pushed up to his elbows and grey t-shirt combo combined with slightly muddied pants was a far cry from his past splendour of rich silks, obis and fluttering sleeves. Mother would turn over in her grave if she knew. Without his exotic markings, there was nothing to distract attention from the deep lines beneath his eyes, as though he had trouble sleeping.

It was the Daiyoukai equivalent of letting himself go. Shameful.

Grabbing Kagome's elbow, he started marching in the opposite direction from the food store.

"Where are we going?" she yelped, following. "Aren't we getting sugar?"

"Something more urgent has come up," he uttered, now feeling strangers stares upon them and hearing comments on Kagome's attire. Pity directed at her. "Clothes first. Then food."

Kagome hummed, digging her heels in and wrenching her arm free with a frown, instead walking beside him like an equal. Sesshoumaru exhaled through his nose, inwardly soothing himself to try and calm down from how such an action stirred his blood.

Within a clothing store, Kagome took her time in the woman's section, flitting back and forth from the changing room.

Sesshoumaru perused their men's selection carefully. Truthfully he hadn't cared one whit about his appearance for years. He'd been so vain before, for good reason. There simply hadn't been a reason to make himself presentable these days.

Grabbing a new jacket, shirts and some more form-fitting pants, along with other clothes, Sesshoumaru emerged from the changing room fairly satisfied.

Kagome stepped out then, dressed in high waisted skinny jeans and a white knitted sweater that really should not have been considered sexy. And yet somehow she pulled it off, clutching her new clothes happily.

Or maybe he was just repressed. He was starting to believe it was the latter.

Buying other necessities, he was kind enough to grab sugar, shampoo, conditioner and a tiny bonsai tree. He handed the plant pot over to her with a mocking smirk, which she stuck her tongue out at him for. "I'll take immaculate care of it. You'll see."

After putting their items in the truck they sat within a cafe together, Kagome looking around at everything and scenting the air.

A little boy passed by their table, who took to staring at her. Blinking and smiling, she gave a little wave.

Gasping, the boy quickly retreated, hurrying back to his parents.

"Woman," Sesshoumaru said sharply.

"Huh?" Kagome froze, catching sight of her hand that had morphed, the palm of her hand and fingers resembling the pads of a paw. Yanking it down and dragged her sleeve self consciously over trembling fingers, she hunched her shoulders.

Sesshoumaru sighed and slipped a hand easily over hers, wrestling the material loose and dragging a thumb over her palm, watching it change back.

Kagome exhaled in a quiet rush, "this is so difficult," she mumbled.

"It won't always be."

Swallowing thickly and nodding, lithe fingers laced with his longer ones. Sesshoumaru stiffened, snapping his gaze to hers.

Kagome smiled enigmatically, "I appreciate your help," she said, "I know I'll be back to acting like a normal human again in no time thanks to you," she grinned, soon dropping his hand when her order of omelette arrived.

Sesshoumaru swiftly retreated his burning palm, focusing on his steak. Flexing his fingers beneath the table didn't help to reduce the tingling rush flooding his bloodstream. Instead, the demon observed her happy expression, mildly concerned. She still wasn't eating any meat. It had been several days now.

"Don't be silly Shinta, I'll hear no more talk of wolves!"

Directing their attention to the family the little boy had run off to, sitting in a booth not too far away, they blinked. The father now seemed frustrated. He continued on in a gruff voice. "It is not a laughing matter, so don't joke about it."

"I'm not playing a prank! That lady changed! She's a wolf!"

Kagome stiffened within her seat as many eyes within the cafe fixed on her, patrons having heard the outburst. Sesshoumaru's body became coiled tight with tension, silently daring any of them to speak ill of her.

A kindly voice cut in then, an elderly waitress approaching the young boy's table carrying a trayful of drinks. "By any chance, did he hear about that strange wolf attack in Tokyo? Perhaps that's where his overactive imagination has come from," she chuckled, setting down their orders and ruffling his hair.

The boy shoved her arm off. "That's not it!"

"Enough, Shinta," his mother hushed him, looking up at the old woman. "That's right, I remember...that poor young man."

The waitress nodded thoughtfully. "There was no report of a wolf going missing from any zoos that I can recall. It was a strange attack, so maybe that's why the little lad remembers it so well. Matsubara Hojo was his name, and his girlfriend went missing too. Such a tragedy."

Kagome's chopstick fell to the table. Blue eyes stared unseeingly ahead of her, frame quivering slightly. Rounded ears started to elongate.

Sesshoumaru reached beneath the table and lay a solid hand on her knee, lengthening his nails and pricking her with sharp claws a little. She jolted and met his intent eyes.

Drawing attention to his mouth, he began breathing carefully to try and calm her escalating breath, keeping their gazes locked.

Gripping his hand tight like a lifeline, Kagome inhaled- held it for a few seconds- and then copied him in exhaling through her nose. The points of her ears smoothed and rounded out again.

Sesshoumaru nodded, glamoured brown eyes warming a touch. They finished their meals quickly after that and exited holding hands.

They did not speak of the young man named Hojo, though the memory of him seemed to weigh heavy and constant on Kagome's shoulders. Sesshoumaru dragged a sharp nailed thumb over her knuckles- and was rewarded with an answering, thankful smile.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mild gore. Starts at the werewolf transformation if you want to skip it.

The return trip consisted of Kagome singing in time with the cassette tape's music. She wasn't bad, but it wasn't as though she was a trained professional- often singing off-key. Sesshoumaru groaned and rested his cheek against his knuckles, driving one-handed.

When they finally arrived back home the sun had long since disappeared beneath the horizon, so Kagome endeavoured to make jam that morning, rising early. So early that Sesshoumaru found himself groping around in bed for her, only to snatch his hand back. _Pathetic. Do not get used to her presence._

Padding downstairs tiredly and scratching his stomach beneath his shirt, he blinked blearily as Kagome flitted about the kitchen. She seemed intent and focused on jam making, so he did not disturb her.

Changing clothes for the day and deciding to patrol the area, Sesshoumaru set out alone. Walking along mountain trails through thin trees and noting a layer of frost lacing the leaves and forest floor, his eyes narrowed a touch.

A fusty scent looped around in a faint trail. It smelled similar to Kagome, and he almost dismissed it as her...yet somehow it just didn't align correctly. He'd been up close and personal with her scent for many nights now. Hers was sweeter.

Frowning softly, he followed the scent as far as it could go- stopping at the edge of a river far from his cabin. Since the area wasn't soaked in the stranger's presence, he could only assume they'd passed through and gone about their business.

 _They must have continued on via the river to mask their scent. A smart stranger, whoever they were._ The thought did not comfort him.

Deciding to pivot on one heel and start heading home, Sesshoumaru scented frosty air. He comforted himself with the knowledge that their scent was stale. If they were a male as suspected, they hadn't marked any territory.

The sweet, pungent odour of blackberry jam reached him, and he smiled slightly, soon distracted. Reaching the front door and opening it, he expected to find her merrily preparing food in the kitchen, a regular occurrence these days. Stepping foot into the living room, something hard split and crumbled beneath his boot.

Sesshoumaru stopped and lifted his foot. The scattered, shattered remains of pottery and earth littered the floor. Kagome's bonsai lay on its side, ruined. His heart clenched, throat seized with something unnamed. Hurrying through the cabin, he noted a trail of destruction around him; bookshelf knocked over and chair tossed to one side, claw marks scraped across the walls, curtains tattered.

"Kagome?" her name slipped from his lips in a thin hiss.

Moving to the kitchen and seeing an abandoned plate of half-eaten jam on bread, he stiffened upon hearing glass shatter to his left. Speeding over to the partially open door of his food cellar, he yanked it open- revealing her crouching form. She was bent over and facing away from him, so he could not see her face. Judging from the guttural, gnashing noises, he could only conclude her to be eating from the floor.

Glancing around at the spilt contents of dried meat he'd been storing, Sesshoumaru's brows drew together.

She'd been holding it in. After several days of denying her want for meat, something had to give. Now she uncontrollably gorged herself on it.

"Kagome," he said again, kinder.

She jolted, back stiffening. Slowly, she wiped at her chin, turning to face him with tearful eyes. Her claws were out, face a mess, hair slightly wild. A piece of meat was held within her fangs, and she swallowed it guiltily.

"I couldn't… h-help myself," she croaked, looking dazedly at the ruined food scattered around her. "I'm so-"

"Do not," Sesshoumaru uttered, causing her to wilt on the spot. He tsked and took a knee, wiping away some dried blood clinging to the corner of her mouth. "Do not… apologise, foolish woman."

Kagome shuddered, inching closer and leaning against his warmth. Sesshoumaru rested a palm on the small of her back, rubbing slightly when she began to let out stifled sobs against his chest, shuddering.

He held her while Kagome cried her heart out, mourning her own condition and the silent acknowledgement that she was not normal. That she could never return to being normal. It would always be a pretence.

Carrying the shaking woman to his bed since she'd tired herself out from crying so much, Sesshoumaru tucked the covers up to her chin. He then got to work.

Cleaning up the house was a simple task. The menial labour took his mind off glimmering blue eyes and the deep well of grief she was currently wallowing in. He doubted she'd allowed herself to mourn Hojo, instead punishing herself over and over in a continuous cycle. He understood, perhaps better than anyone.

After disposing of the ruined meat, tidying up his living room, kitchen, and rearranging furniture to cover claw marks- along with replacing his curtains and then scrubbing all surfaces clean, Sesshoumaru didn't stop there.

By the time Kagome wandered downstairs after a few hours, creeping through the shadowed house gingerly, he'd set up everything perfectly.

She stopped and stared, breath catching in her throat.

A decent sized tub of water sat within the living room before a flickering fireplace. Steam licked at the surface of white bubbles. Shampoo, soap and conditioner along sat to one side.

Kagome slid wide, disbelieving eyes to Sesshoumaru, who leaned against the wall. Pushing off from it, he tossed a fluffy towel in her direction, which she caught. "S-sesshoumaru, what- why did you…"

"The water is turning cold, do not put my efforts to waste by having a lukewarm bath," he grunted.

She bit her plump bottom lip, before abruptly lurching closer. He started as she crossed the room in long strides, rising up on tiptoe and cupping his cheek. Soft lips pressed to a magenta stripe, and his entire being flared alive.

Kagome rocked back on her heels and beamed up at him with palpable emotion. Despite the strength of that smile, her voice came out soft. "You're the best."

Golden eyes searched her face. "Hn," he shifted with the intent to leave.

"You can stay...if you want."

_What?_

Sesshoumaru paused, not able to mask his surprise as he glanced at her, witnessing rouge dust pale cheeks. "N-not like that! Just...stay and talk to me f-from a safe distance, no perving," she muttered, turning on her heel and starting to wriggle her sweater above her head.

The sight of an arched, bare back had him swiftly facing away. Sesshoumaru closed burning eyes and counted to ten, trying to ignore the sounds of articles of clothing slipping off her body to pool at her feet. Hearing her approach the bath and make a noise- indicating her testing the temperature- the sound of lapping water came next before she let out a long, exquisite moan.

Sesshoumaru gnashed his teeth together, _hard._ This had not been a seduction attempt. He'd merely been trying to make her feel better. How had things turned out like this?

"You can turn around. I think the bubbles are covering enough," she mumbled.

Opening his eyes to glare hard at the wall, he cleared his throat and hummed, sitting before the fire and sparing her a glance. Long legs had draped over the side, one hooked over the other. They were sleek, mouth-watering- a faint sheen of water gliding down her knees that beaded into droplets. By the Gods, _he ached to chase those water droplets with his tongue._

He shook himself, abdomen tightening.

"Hojo was my boyfriend," Kagome quietly confessed into the hushed room.

He gave a noise of affirmation to show he was listening, dragging dazed attention back to the flickering flames.

"I got bitten when I went hiking with my friends. It happened when we camped for the night near a forest. After hearing a noise, I left my tent while everyone else was sleeping...and this _thing_ jumped on me. It was massive and had a stocky, bulky build- not like me when I change- so maybe there are different werewolf forms. I get the feeling it was a male, all grey fur and attitude. It bit into my shoulder but didn't get to do anything more as my friends attacked it and scared it off," she sighed. "I went to the hospital and they figured it was a wolf bite. Hojo was really sweet and supportive throughout. He visited me at home and gave me a bunch of herbal remedies to help with the wound. It...healed so quickly. Then the meat cravings started. I caught myself salivating just smelling the stupid stuff. In fact, my senses steadily grew so focused and sharp the slightest noise would irritate me it was so loud. I yelled at Souta to turn down the volume of his video game even when it was on the lowest setting."

Kagome tilted her head back against the tub, "when the full moon rolled around...I knew something was wrong. I knew, yet I'd been avoiding Hojo so much because of my changes that I felt bad when he showed up for a date I'd cancelled. So I let him take me out to the movies that evening- some crappy horror movie," her breathing hitched and she smoothed a hand through dark locks. "We were the only two in there. I remember screaming in agony as I changed but no one came to help us. The staff must have left us unattended. I- oh Sesshoumaru I...I…"

"You do not have to keep going," his voice was a calm, steady thing in the middle of the storm.

She let out a muffled noise, having pressed her hands to her face. She then sank beneath the surface of the water- rising after a moment and sighing. "Feels better to get it off my chest. You can imagine the rest."

"Hn," he slanted his attention back to her. "Does your family know that you are alive?"

Kagome nodded miserably, shifting and crossing both arms to rest upon the rim of the tub, cushioning her chin on them and gazing at him with dark blue eyes. "Phoned Mom after it happened. I was a mess and…told her it would be safer for everyone if I was away from them. Mostly though, I just feel awful for Hojo's poor parents. They should see their son's murderer get justice but instead I ran away like a coward."

"You did not want to kill him that night, and you could hardly stand up in court and transform," he snorted. "Forgive yourself, woman."

Kagome blew at her damp bangs and giggled softly. "You're using that commanding tone again. Not gonna happen this time, bud. You can't demand something like that. However I'll…try. One day I might be able to face his parents…"

Sesshoumaru didn't think that a wise decision, but decided not to try and dissuade her. Seeing them would be her choice.

Lounging back in the tub and beginning to lather her arms and collarbone with soap, she hummed. "Sesshoumaru, is it going to be this way forever? Will I always be afraid of losing control?"

He quickly looked away, heat hooking low in his stomach. "No. You will master your reactions."

Washing herself, dark brows furrowed, her voice gentling. "How do you know for sure? I mean you've mastered your reactions but you're still afraid."

"... I do not fear losing control."

"Yes you do, just not in the same way."

Golden eyes widened a fraction, and he turned to face the impudent woman- only to find her watching him. Kagome seemed to drop it, lips thinning. "Never mind. You...haven't heard of a werewolf curse being broken, right?"

"The only way to break it is to kill the beast."

Her wet arms wrapped loosely around herself, fingers brushing against her neck absentmindedly.

Sesshoumaru eyed the faint scar from his bite lingering upon that glistening skin. "If the possibility of a 'cure' was open-"

"I'd take it in a heartbeat," Kagome grit out. He frowned, shifting, wondering why that bothered him. Slowly elaborating, her words shook with barely suppressed feeling. "Then I wouldn't have to mind myself constantly. I wouldn't feel like this broken, twisted... _thing_ instead of a person."

Sesshoumaru bristled and stood. The part of him that had viewed them as 'alike' sneered at this sentiment. "It is unwise to view yourself as broken merely because you cannot be 'normal.' You have changed, but are not damaged beyond repair."

"But I feel like I am!" she snapped, sitting up. "I'm a damn puzzle piece that doesn't fit on the board anymore! Walking among those people in the village just made it worse! Y-you mentioned before that I'm maintaining a glamour, well I can feel it now," gripping the tub hard, knuckles bled bone white. "All the time. It's like my body is constantly fighting to maintain this shape. Do you really want to see what I look like if I just let it slip? How ugly I really am now?"

"Yes, you fool!" he hissed, stooping down and getting right in her face- in perilous range of her jaws. Let her bite. "This one has seen monsters. Real monsters. I am one," Sesshoumaru searched her gaze. "Show me your worst, little mortal," regal tones dipped into a mocking lift as he tilted his chin up to regard her beneath pale lashes.

Kagome bristled and panted, breaths coming quicker and quicker, chest heaving. She gripped her hair and shuddered, keening and yowling in distress as her body quaked- before letting go with a shudder. Sesshoumaru wasn't sure how to describe it. It was like an invisible hand had smoothed down her skin like one would fur, creating a gliding effect and ripple. Black hair puffed up and became wilder in volume. Her body shuddered, bone-cracking sounds assaulting his hearing before Sesshoumaru felt a shove hit his abdomen, lurching his body away.

His back made heavy impact with the ground- the base of his skull smacking against wooden floors. His head throbbed, a guttural growl echoing through his ears along with the sound of bathwater thrashing before he focused on the figure poised above him. His shirt became soaked from water dripping down her body.

Knees bent and a misshapen hand lay flat upon his chest. The fingers were long, nails having elongated into claw-like talons.

Wet, pale skin had turned ashen grey due to a slight layer of fur upon her skin. Her ears were pointed and thin, no longer the fluffy triangles upon her head- they were sharp, partially hidden by the waves of damp, dark hair hanging down, obscuring her face. Two blue eyes stared at him unblinking through the strands, the whites of her sclera gone, having dyed a dark black.

Sesshoumaru lifted a palm up- only for his hand to be pinned down beside his head. Sharp claws bit into his flesh, a thunderous snarl wrecking her naked frame. He was not deterred though, and exposed perfect white teeth, bellowing out an answering snarl. He then reached with his free hand.

Kagome jerked and reared back, but he was quicker, pushing the strands aside.

Her nose had partially transformed into a flat muzzle, lips peeled back as high as they managed to expose a large jaw full of teeth, canines pronounced, fangs ready and glistening.

This was not the willowy, beautiful woman, nor the sleek, lustrous maned wolf. She was something in between. Malformed. A chimera of features.

Sesshoumaru looked up at her placidly in all his pale beauty, seeing the note of distrust lurking in her eyes, hearing it behind that simmering growl locked behind her teeth. The fear of rejection soured the air like pungent spilt milk that had festered for far too long. He despised it.

His eyes snapped wider then, dying crimson red. Surprise registered on her monstrous features. Nonetheless, she held still as he leaned up, silver hair rippling with a phantom breeze to whip around them. Pretty magenta markings became jagged and bold. Thin lips peeled back to expose sharp teeth, but they spread wider and wider- cutting across his face and straining his handsome features into a frightening, bestial smile.

The monster woman exhaled through large teeth in a quiet hiss, leaning closer.

His lashes fell partially shut as she glided her cheek against his, nuzzling and growling lowly. It vibrated from her body into his. Sesshoumaru answered with a rumbling purr, curling a loose grip into the soft, wild hair at the nape of her neck. Warm breaths intermingled, strong arms curling about a slim waist. His calloused hand dragged over cool wet skin, gliding up her spine.

Kagome's clawed fingers rested delicately against his cheek, and he leaned against her palm without fear, unflinching even as one nicked his skin. She made a noise, brushing her nose against his and running the flat of a slick tongue over the scratch, causing it to sweetly sting.

Sesshoumaru found himself panting, staring into dark, arresting eyes. Pale lashes lowered to her mouthful of sharp teeth, uncaring, leaning closer-

A distant howl caused them to freeze. They broke apart, snapping their gazes to his living room window. Kagome stiffened and clambered off him, snatching up a towel and yanking it haphazardly around herself, staring out at the dark woods.

"W-what…" she breathed. "What was that? There are no wild wolves in Japan…are there?"

Sesshoumaru collected himself, standing and smoothing out his features once more. Following and stopping directly behind the woman whose face and body had also reverted back to her regular one, he squinted.

"None that I have heard of," he uttered tightly.

"Could it...be?"

"There is no full moon tonight," Sesshoumaru quietly dismissed.

Kagome nodded, gazing out at the silent and still trees beyond the house. "Maybe it was just a fox or something."

He chuckled, the action sending puffs of air dancing across the nape of her neck and causing goosebumps to rise. "Foxes do not sound like that."

"Oh? And are you the expert on foxes, mister Dog man?-" Kagome had turned, voice suddenly losing strength when noticing his proximity. The memory of what had almost transpired moments before came to mind. Sesshoumaru stepped back slowly.

"This one will go and...check, to be certain. Enjoy the remainder of your bath," he muttered, stiffly moving away and grabbing a coat, tugging it on.

Kagome nodded, cheeks heating. Disappointment fanned into her scent. "Yeah, sure."

He swallowed and left her alone, padding out of the cabin into the cool, biting night air. Highly aware of her vulnerability while bathing, Sesshoumaru did not stray far, instead looping around the area in a loose circle, scenting the woods.

There was nothing but the elusive smell that had caught his attention earlier. Whatever it was, he silently demanded it leave them in peace.

* * *

They shared a bed every night without fail. The routine they fell into varied slightly depending on what Kagome wanted to do, but they more or less practised hunting every day, along with breathing exercises and glamour.

Both had become so wrapped up in this safe space of daily habit that the next full moon loomed upon them faster than expected.

"I'm not ready," Kagome had said firmly. "I know I'm not. Don't let me get loose, Sesshoumaru."

He'd considered her gravely, wanting to argue. Cooping up such a magnificent beast didn't sound right. However, after she'd expressed fears of hunting the villagers in her changed form he'd reluctantly agreed to her terms.

The evening of the full moon, Sesshoumaru tested metal secures bolted deep into a wall, tugging them. They didn't budge. When he tried to exert some force, he frowned, sensing the tenuous amount of pressure they could take. _He_ could break free from these, but her? He wasn't certain.

"Do I want to know why you already have silver manacles set up in your basement?"

Sesshoumaru glanced at the woman lingering in his doorway. There was already something wilder about her eyes- hair slightly puffy in volume.

"I set them up after we agreed to this...living arrangement. Just in case you desired to be cuffed."

Kagome's expression flickered with shock, raising her brows and gaining a mischievous expression. "Oh _really?_ "

"Not like that," thin lips tugged up into a smirk.

"No, no, continue," she teased. "Tell me all about it."

Giving a dusty chuckle, Sesshoumaru turned back to the shackles fixed to the wall, giving them another tug.

Kagome drew up close to his side and closed her hand around one, yanking. The metal protested, remaining in place.

"I hope they're enough," she murmured.

"They're not the only safety measure in place, you are forgetting about the most important one; myself."

Kagome giggled with mirth, lifting both hands and putting her wrists together. "I guess there's no point in putting it off. I might change soon. Tie me up," perfect lips curved, masterfully hiding her mounting terror.

Sesshoumaru could sense it though. Indulging her with an answering smile and grasping her arm gently, the cool metal was closed around her wrists, locking them.

He did the same for her ankles, lengthy chains on the cuffs taking into account her changed form so that she'd be able to stand comfortably. They were mostly for show though. The main power keeping her fixed to the wall were the bulkier silver chains that he crisscrossed over her chest- looping over one shoulder and hooking under her arm.

Kagome blinked up at him when he was done.

"How are you feeling?" he uttered.

"Kind of ridiculous, and hungry, and...scared," Kagome murmured, looking up at a small window near the ceiling that allowed moonlight to partially enter. She shuddered, starting to breathe heavier. "You should step back. I can feel it coming."

Sesshoumaru tilted her chin up, running a thumb over her jaw. "By all means feel ridiculous and hungry, woman, but do not be afraid," he stepped back, closing the door and bolting it shut. "This one will be here."

Blue eyes shimmered with unshed tears. Kagome nodded, before starting to groan and hiss with pain.

The process contorted her body- made her jolt, spasm and scream. Bones cracked and quivered, expanding- her skin rushing to accommodate them and sometimes failing- causing blood to be shed and flayed muscle exposed until fur started to race over flesh.

Sesshoumaru observed it all with wide eyes. The transformation was ghastly, horrific. Perhaps the worst part was his inability to do anything. He kept inching slightly closer and then away again, crooning softly and trying to soothe her through it. Her agonised sobs, whimpers and cries tore at him in new ways. Kagome looked helpless as she collapsed on the floor, gazing at him sightlessly with wide eyes- until she squeezed them shut and visibly stopped fighting it. Black silky fur then spilt forth like gushing water- cloaking her form until she lay unrecognisable. Pointed ears perked up atop her head, a fluffy long tail sweeping out.

The large maned werewolf shifted and picked herself up, long legs shaking. She stumbled slightly, raising a thick black neck and pinning him with a narrow-eyed glare. She growled, paws attempting to move- only to be held fast. Lowering her head and sniffing at the metal between her ankles, Kagome bit at it with pearly white teeth, her snarl rising in volume.

Sesshoumaru let out a rumbling noise, stepping closer. "Stop," he commanded. "You will remain here."

She jerked and opened large jaws wide, bellowing out a snarl of rage and baring her teeth. The wolf began to yank her body away from the wall with quick, hard tugs. Muscle, sinew and bone strained against metal.

Sesshoumaru got up in her face, appearance morphing and shifting so that his features became ghastly and partially transformed. Slamming his palms into the wall beside her head with a louder, deafening snarl, he allowed spittle to coat his bared fangs. Maintaining eye contact, the Daiyoukai silently bid that she back down.

This appeared to be the wrong decision.

Kagome immediately bristled, hackles rising. She lunged for him with the intent to bite, and when he deflected- a forehead smacked into his chest. Sesshoumaru grunted, moving back and blurring mid-air to escape from her jaws. By the time he touched down on the floor again- a screech of metal sounded out moments before the busted shackles hit the ground at his feet.

With the toss of her head- chains clenched between teeth were ripped free from the wall. Sesshoumaru grit his teeth as brick and dust burst forth. He flicked a wrist up- green energy whip sputtering to life. Lashing it towards her with every intent to bind and shackle her again, golden eyes widened as she bent low on her knees before bursting forth in a jump that sent her straight to the tiny window instead of heading for the basement door as he'd anticipated.

A hole was blown out of the side of his cabin, shaking the foundations. From within the debris, a monstrous black wolf lept free, bounding away and lifting her muzzle to the heavens; singing her freedom.

Sesshoumaru jumped out of his ruined basement through the sizable hole and blurred across frosted grass in hot pursuit.

Continuing to howl a haunting, drawling ballad, Kagome ran at full speed down the mountain path.

_She's heading in the direction of the village!_

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed and he forced youki to rise, cloaking power around him. The action felt nostalgic as he suddenly soared into the air, flying. He hadn't taken to the skies in so long…

Following the black streak darting down the dirt path, he sped quicker, passing her and dropping down before the wolf. Expelling acid from his claws and lashing them in a wide arch at the ground caused her to yelp and stop. The green substance before her paws ate into the grass, opening up a small gaping gash that hazardous fumes curled free from.

Sesshoumaru watched her through the acidic haze.

"Turn back," he forced out through clenched teeth.

She looped back and paced the length of the hissing, putrid earth, quietly seething. He could hear it in the simmering growl building at the back of her throat- the agitated shake of her neck, mane-like fur swaying.

 _'I will kill you if you get in my way'_ , she said in her movements.

' _You cannot defeat me'_ , said his. Then, because she let out a thunderous sound of outrage, Sesshoumaru gentled his tense stance, tucking sharp claws against his palms. ' _I do not wish to fight.'_

She showed her teeth, letting thick saliva pool onto the ground as a mournful noise slipped free. ' _Everyone fights me, no one wants what I am.'_

His eyes gentled, ' _that is not true.'_

Black ears twitched, the creature pacing back and forth like a caged animal. ' _What do you want?'_

Sesshoumaru thought for a moment, pausing and straightening, looking to the trees. _'I want to run by your side.'_

Jagged jaws spread higher on her face in a mockery of a smile, barking a high noise. ' _Ha! Very funny. You'd chase me on those scrawny legs, Mr Dog Man?'_

His gaze flattened. ' _You'd be surprised.'_

Kagome shook her herself, glossy fur catching the moonlight as she preened, mind and confidence unfiltered in this form. _'I won't accept a companion who can't keep up with me. I'm too powerful and wonderful to make myself smaller for any male_ ,' she started to prowl towards the forest away from him.

"I would not demand that of you- stop!" Sesshoumaru suddenly exclaimed. The large wolf did not listen, her hand-like paw tripping a thin wire.

His body collided with hers seconds before a rope could close around her ankle- the tight noose skittering up to hang from the branches.

Rolling and scraping his back painfully along some rocks, Sesshoumaru landed with his shoulder blades hitting the ground- a solid mass of fur flopping atop him heavily a second later- causing him to wheeze like a bagpipe. He probably made a noise like one too.

The wolf huffed, shifting big paws and levelling her muzzle to look straight down at him. Sesshoumaru stared back without fear, despite sharp, strong jaws in range of his throat.

She shifted her attention to the branches, eyeing the rope.

A rabbit trap.

Her black nose twitched, regarding him again with solemn blue eyes.

Resting a hand in the puffy black fur of her neck and minding it aside slightly to see better, Sesshoumaru frowned at the trap. "I did not leave that there…"

She tensed with a sharp inhale, yanking herself up from atop him and standing, head lowering, ears flattening and tail pointing straight behind her. He watched her face transform into a mask of ferocity. If he thought she'd been growling loudly at him before, Sesshoumaru had been mistaken. Kagome let out a thunderclap of a deep, threatening sound, hair standing erect on her back, lips curling back and incisors on full display.

Sesshoumaru had no choice but to crane his neck back inelegantly, looking at the upside down forest.

A large tawny coloured creature padded out from the shadows.

Immediately the masculine scent gave it away, the wolf regarding them with cobalt blue eyes. His tongue lolled out, tail swishing in a slight wag.

Sesshoumaru attempted to sit up, protect her- but Kagome shoved her paw against his chest, raising her head and crouching slightly as though ready to pounce, snarling.

_'Keep your distance!'_

The male stopped and tilted his head, before starting to frolic around in his own personal space, placing the front of his body down in a bow and raising his rear high in a playful stance.

Sesshoumaru and Kagome shared a look.

_'W-what is he doing?'_

"That is not a werewolf," he grunted, shoving her paw aside and slipping out from beneath her to stand, dusting himself off. "That is a male wolf demon, and it appears he likes you."

Kagome kept up her silent snarling, fur bristling.

The wind picked up around them, twisting and twirling around the male in a mini cyclone. By the time it died down, leaves scattering, a dark-haired man stood in its place, grinning broadly.

"Heh...I knew you'd be somethin' special ever since I caught your scent a few days ago, but you're even more beautiful than I imagined," he said confidently, jabbing a thumb against his chest. "The name's Kouga. I'm Chief of a wolf demon tribe further east." It appeared he only had eyes for Kagome, not sparing Sesshoumaru a glance, which he grumbled slightly at. "Who are you, pretty eyes?" Kouga leered at the maned wolf.

Kagome remained tense and poised, silent now. _'That's not your business.'_

He chuckled and scratched his nose, stepping closer- only to halt when Sesshoumaru raised a hand, nails shimmering with a faint green glow. "You, _boy._ Are you the one who set up that trap?"

Kouga raised bushy brows, adjusting his tank top and standing comfortably despite the chill in the air. "Yeah I am, what of it? Wanted to get her attention a little, is all."

Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what to take umbrage with first; the idea of a male hunting on his land or the possible hair-brained scheme that would've resulted in this dolt stringing up Kagome to get her attention.

She shook herself and trotted away before either of them could react, snubbing the wolf. ' _Well you don't have it.'_

Kouga jumped with surprising speed, blocking her path in an instant and spreading his arms wide. Sesshoumaru noticed the brown tail remaining untransformed on the male start to swish in an excited wag again.

"Don't be like that, you should feel honoured! I've decided that you're perfect. You'll definitely become my woman."

A stab of pure unadulterated fury shot through his bloodstream faster than any hit from a drug, causing Sesshoumaru to pant once, twice- then swallow his breath and try to stifle it. Kagome's nose twitched before she pointed her muzzle up in the air.

_'No.'_

Kouga dropped his arms, "hah?"

Growling softly, Kagome doubled back on herself and prowled up to Sesshoumaru. Her head reached his shoulder in height, so when she bumped her muzzle against him it rocked the demon slightly on his heels. She didn't stop there, brushing around him and pushing her head beneath his throat in an unmistakable sign of something Sesshoumaru wasn't ready to confront.

Kouga gaped, "what the fuck? Y-you're not serious! He's an old man!"

The Daiyoukai's throat had closed, seizing up with too many emotions, so he failed to respond in any meaningful way other than stiffly glaring. His body had gone still, instincts slightly responding to her continual nearness and nuzzling against him, stirring his blood and heartbeat.

_'He is not! He's plenty young and besides, that's not the point. He's who I-'_

Sesshoumaru rested a shaky hand against her feathery soft head, petting. "Enough. Let us...let us leave…"

She crooned and gnashed deadly teeth in a playful huff, bumping noses with him. Sesshoumaru blinked but ignored the cold, wet patch now irritating his face, cheeks heating. He turned and started to stride away, resting a hand on her neck as the wolf followed.

"Hey!" Kouga bellowed from behind them, clearly unused to not getting everything he wanted as an alpha. "I'm not just gonna give up, ya know! I sense it, it's close! You'll say yes then!"

Too wrapped up in inwardly screaming, Sesshoumaru stoically kept walking instead of questioning this. A part of himself calmly and dryly thought that if all he'd had to do to get werewolf Kagome under control was let her nuzzle and flirt with him, perhaps he'd have done it sooner.

Maybe.

Kagome growled softly, an indication that she was annoyed, he wasn't sure by what. His lack of interest in removing the whelp from his territory certainly frustrated him, but he was reeling too much to focus.

Eyeing the sizable hole she'd left in his cabin, Kagome flicked her gaze to mist-laden woods. ' _There's still time left in the night. Can we not run together?'_

Sesshoumaru lowered himself down through it to land in his basement, sighing and looking at the damage. "No. We will start work on repairing this. Knock over a tree for me."

Pointed ears flicked, tail swishing in an agitated manner. Golden eyes narrowed up at her, "now, woman," tone dripping with venom and tempered steel, he forced a command into it.

Silky black fur seemed to shiver. Letting out a soft noise, the werewolf turned and trotted away, stopping at a sizeable tree.

Sesshoumaru got to work on clearing the debris from his basement with a broom, clearing it away with a good amount of speed due to his supernatural abilities.

Kagome dragged a tree over to the cabin, her jaws locked on a thick branch. In no time at all, the tree had been chopped and cut down to size, whittled and sanded down into planks. Jumping into the basement, Kagome watched from inside as he patched up the hole. It wasn't completely professional but it would do for now.

By the time he'd finished, the moon had crept across the sky a little. Music softly floated out of a tape player as they settled within the basement together, his house not allowing for her giant size to snooze elsewhere.

Back against the wall and a whisky in hand, Sesshoumaru sat on a nest of furs- the previously rabid and feral wolf laying against his side. He listened keenly for any further sounds of Kouga but it appeared he'd slinked away. Kagome shifted, pressing closer.

Resting a clawed hand within the thick feathery mane atop her neck, long fingers combed through silky strands tiredly.

"Why did you listen to me? Help me with the house?" he muttered. "Earlier, you seemed set on wreaking havoc on the village."

The werewolf couldn't answer, resting her great head on hand-like paws and giving a long exhale. Talking to her while she was in this form felt mildly freeing, in a way. He didn't have to confront any emotion brimming within beauteous blue eyes or catch his breath at the sight of long exposed legs.

"You wonder why I don't transform, do you not?" Sesshoumaru murmured into the darkness. Everything lay still and undisturbed, music drawling softly in the background. A pretty, melodic tune. "It is because I remember it when I become my true self. A certain day. The scent of ash chokes air from my lungs. Burning bodies fill my nose, sharp like trapped water. There is fire everywhere, licking at tall trees and blocking my path. I cannot save them. I can never save them, not even in my dreams."

His hand had become still, so he felt Kagome's neck shift as she raised her head, likely looking at him.

Dimmed golden eyes slid shut as he tilted his head back, pressing his skull against the unforgivingly cold wall. He downed the rest of his whisky, basking in the acidic and bitter aftertaste it ignited in his throat. "This one was not fast enough. It ultimately did not matter how much power I possessed or what strength I'd accumulated. The armies still found my kin and slaughtered them. I had been distracted by battle at the time, and a forest fire blocked my path once I realised the deception. Despite wielding a sword so godly it could bring back lives- by the time I reached them it was too late. They were but ash."

Clawed fingers twitched and curled. "My son…he- was small. Too small for a pup. I held him...after the fire."

Sesshoumaru knew his expression hadn't flickered with emotion. His control was perfect, his voice flawlessly steady. And yet for some reason, a wet sensation began to drag over one of his cheeks. Kagome licked at his face, pulling back a little to croon softly.

He blinked, lips twitching upwards. With a dusty exhale, the demon pressed his face against a cosy mass of fur at her neck, closing his eyes.

"Foolish woman."

With a gentleness that her great form belied, the werewolf tucked him closer and curled herself around him protectively, shielding him against a faint chill in the air.

Upon waking together that morning, Sesshoumaru dutifully carried her upstairs and paused at the window, noting the first snowfall of the year.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: smutish elements

They didn't talk about his lost family. Sesshoumaru had no desire to in the cold light of day. Kagome said she was pleased she'd been complacent enough to return to the house with him and not go berserk, though when any mention of Kouga came up, she'd turn oddly silent and embarrassed.

Watching unmoving trees through the window become coated with a thick powdery layer of snow, Sesshoumaru observed the white flecks with a grim acknowledgement of what it meant. Even more work. Less food.

"That flea bitten wolf better not have hunted in my area," he grumbled to himself.

"You haven't sensed him around since the Full Moon last week, right?" Kagome hummed from his dog-eared armchair that was much too big for her, setting down her messy attempt at knitting. He assumed she'd been working on a scarf, though it looked more like a misshapen woolly handkerchief.

Sesshoumaru shook his head slightly, taking a sip of green tea.

She chewed on her plump bottom lip in a maddening fashion. "S-sesshoumaru...about what happened with Kouga."

"Hn?"

Fretting silently, she picked at her creation. "It's just- I never want to make you feel uncomfortable, and I feel like I did. So I'm sorry. It's just that you're comforting and that's why I was nuzzling around you, k? I-it's not anything deeper than that."

He could sense the lie in her words, along with underlying guilt. Obviously his past had prompted her to think he wouldn't be receptive to any...propositions.

And she was right, of course. Sesshoumaru had resolved long ago to isolate himself and stew in heavy silence as penance. Or perhaps it hadn't been his intention at all yet somewhere along the way he'd lost sight of what he could be after losing so much of himself.

"You broke into my room several times to sleep beside me and only now are you fretting about making me uncomfortable?" arching a brow, amusement coloured his voice.

Kagome smiled slowly, relaxing a little and knowing she'd been forgiven. However, blue eyes remained unreadable, sliding away. "Y-yeah, heh. Silly me."

Standing and setting down her knitting, she stretched and padded across the living room.

"Where are you going?"

Grabbing her coat off the hook, Kagome shrugged. "I'm just going to patrol the area in case Kouga has shown his face," she hummed. "I think I'll try transforming a little."

Sesshoumaru watched the woman move toward the door. She'd been transforming parts of her body fairly easily lately. He noted that she seemed to pause and thought better of something, placing her fur-lined coat back onto the hook and jogging away with a careless wave.

Rising as soon as she left, Sesshoumaru sped to the upstairs window to regard her.

Kagome ran out into heavy snowfall, holding her hand out to catch some flurries. White flecks caught in her fall of dark hair that fell to mid-back. Long legs shifted as she jogged, starting to strip a few items of clothing off and placing them beneath a tree, fur rushing along pale skin.

Sesshoumaru was pleased she'd put on weight in her time there, more meat on her bones and a healthy glow to rosy cheeks.

He watched enraptured as she disappeared into the white landscape beyond the trees. His heart clenched.

_I should be with her._

But...no. He knew he had to start taking a step back. Kagome would likely leave by the time winter ended. She'd have no need of him soon. The thought shouldn't have bothered him as much as it did.

Sesshoumaru frowned as not two minutes later- the dark shape of a half-wolf, half-woman came bolting back towards his cabin.

Blurring downstairs, Sesshoumaru yanked his door just as Kagome transformed, wrapping both arms tight around herself to shield her nudity and ducking beneath his arm.

"What-"

"NOT NOW!" she yelled, disappearing upstairs.

Blinking, but catching a whiff of something, he made the mistake of inhaling- bones immediately locking, body stiffening. Turning dazed attention to the snowy ground Kagome had just sprinted across, he swallowed thickly. Blood dotted in a faint trail over pure white snow.

Heat rushed. It split fire through the Daiyoukai's veins, rushing straight towards his abdomen. His cock stirred. He sucked in a long inhale, getting high off the rich, syrupy, bewitching scent of her heat cycle that had just begun.

Sesshoumaru then shook himself, heart drumming hard and making him pant a little. This was _not_ good.

"I-I had been wondering why I hadn't started my period since I got bitten," Kagome hesitantly called from the top of the stairs, creeping down and causing the wood to give loud squeaks of protest.

"Hn…" Sesshoumaru caught his breath, resting a hand on the door to steady himself. She'd likely put a tampon in, but that wouldn't be enough to save her from the effects.

"So um, how long will this last?"

Fuck she smelled so fucking appetising. Sesshoumaru's mouth filled with saliva. All he wanted to do was bury his tongue between her thighs and-

He visibly gulped, parting his lips and trying to ignore the twisting ache in his stomach. "5 to 10 days...sometimes more," Sesshoumaru croaked.

"Ah," Kagome let out a breathy sound, which did not help the situation in his pants. "Mn...it...it feels different from my other periods. W-what's going on?"

Didn't she know? Of course she didn't, she was so innocent- but no, not completely. Hadn't she offered herself once before? And she strutted around so confidently baring long tempting legs to his hungry male gaze, inviting him to stay while she bathed, teasing, touching. She wanted it-

Sesshoumaru dug his forehead against the front door, quivering.

"This bleeding cycle is not like a humans," he gritted out. "You will be compelled to mate."

"W-what?" her voice had become thin and squeaky. "Is this what Kouga was talking about? He said he could sense something."

"Most likely."

Kagome fell silent, mild fear mingling with blooming arousal. He could hear her shift and lean against the wall, hips dragging a little. "...Is he going to force me into bed with him?"

"I will not let him!" Sesshoumaru burst, snarling and whipping his head back to pin her with a burning gaze. Blue eyes widened, searching his face. Kagome's brows drew together, and he heard her silent question as clear as day;

' _Would you force me?'_

Choking on a pant, Sesshoumaru snuffed out the burning embers, squeezing his eyes shut and digging nails hard into his palms, pricking the skin. "This one will protect you. But...only a Saint could remain at your side unaffected. Gather supplies, quickly- then lock yourself in my room. Only leave for necessities. I will guard the house from outside."

"We have to be separated for that long?"

He growled softly, "indeed. Do not let me into the room under any circumstances, should I ask. Not unless you'd like to be pupped."

Kagome in her dark sweater dress that she'd obviously flung on in a rush, seemed to hitch the skirts up a little absentmindedly, brushing herself along the wall in an instinctual rut of her hips and gaining a half-lidded look, blushing. She then shook herself and crossed her arms firmly over her chest. "L-logically I know I don't, but...my body felt weird when you mentioned it."

"Hm, your will needs to be iron-strong, woman," Sesshoumaru nodded sharply to the kitchen, panting. "Go now- _hah_ \- hurry."

With that said, he grabbed the key to the house and a coat, pulling open his heavy front door.

"Sesshoumaru-"

Stiffening and freezing on the spot, he glanced at the shuddering woman over one shoulder. Sweat beaded at her temple, but Kagome smiled as though it weren't there, her expression earnest and sincere like always. It made his chest warm. "I'll...miss you."

Disorientated, as though he'd missed a step on the stairs, he could only nod stiffly and step outside, barring her away from himself with the turn of a key.

 _Do not say such things_ , he blew out a hot, shaking breath. _It only makes me desire you all the more._

* * *

He lasted five days. Five days out in the bitter cold, taking shelter beneath tall trees and sulking around in the snow around his cabin like a mad man. The scent of Kouga came and went on the breeze, though he saw no trace of him. Sometimes Sesshoumaru thought he imagined it.

Hunger clawed, a constant companion- and it was nothing that any rabbit nor deer could satisfy. His mouth remained dry no matter how much he tried to slick his thirst with water from an icy river. He'd become hot and cold at random intervals, and the desire to shove his pants down and take himself into his palm came even more frequently. But that wasn't what he wanted.

Sesshoumaru wanted the feathery brush of inky black hair wound tight around his claws. For lithe fingers and soothing hands to smooth over his stripes and long, strong legs to wrap around his waist and tighten to lock them together as he thrust into a slick, welcoming heat.

His lips burned with want of kisses. His skin beaded with sweat for want of a lolling tongue and the hard scrape of punishing teeth. His fangs ached, cock straining now. Blue eyes haunted him, beckoning.

Half crazed with lust and shuddering, Sesshoumaru found himself standing at his front door, snapping the key to one side in the lock and gently letting it glide open with a creak of its hinges.

His shadow loomed long and large within the room. An exquisite, mouth-watering scent saturated the air like heavy fog. Sweet yet smooth and rich, tumbling down his throat like dewy honey.

Sesshoumaru closed the door with a calm he did not feel, before gliding up the old stairs soundlessly.

" _..Ah!...Gn...hah…"_

He stopped outside his bedroom door, closing a large hand over the cool metal handle. Kagome's noises drowned out all else within his head. All he could hear was her- all he could smell was her. All he desired to see was her. Her scent drugged his senses and hardened his cock, forcing a hiss out from parted lips. He could practically _feel_ her, alone, writhing on the bed. From the small grunts of frustration that occasionally peppered the moans, he could tell her fingers weren't doing enough.

His foot shifted closer- before Sesshoumaru resisted, bracing an arm on the door. This was torture. He needed release. He needed _something._

Loosening his constricting pants and shoving them down striped hips, he wrapped a hand around his straining length. Pre-cum beaded on the head. Stroking it sent a spike of pleasure skittering through him.

But he could still smell her, and it egged him on. Every breath brought back those carnal, fraying desires; Burning touches, bruising teeth and power. All that power bursting through him into her, bringing Kagome to the edge and making her shine through dark, lusty clouds. She'd look so fucking beautiful, he just knew it.

"Mnn-ah! _Sesshoumaru!_ "

Golden eyes snapped red. The demon became rigid. He bit down on his bottom lip. Hard.

Wood splintered beneath one of his hands, claws biting into the door. He can feel a thud from the other side like she'd jumped off the bed- and rapid footsteps- her scent looming closer. Her shadow became apparent beneath the door.

A crescent moon brow pressed against his arm and Sesshoumaru decided he must have lost it. Surely Kagome wasn't doing what he thought she was doing and pressing herself against the slab of wood separating them like he was. Hearing her become louder, smelling her, it's more than enough to inspire his hand to move faster. Her moans and presence felt so much more intimate with her closer, fingers no doubt buried deep inside her cunt. Not enough. It must not be enough for her. Sesshoumaru groaned loudly. Shuddering and snarling, he rocked his hips, thrusting needily into his hand. Kagome moaned through the door, seeking something, finding it with him as they let out twin moans of completion, Sesshoumaru cumming into his hand.

He hadn't lasted long, though that didn't strike him as surprising. He couldn't recall when he'd indulged himself. The stickiness coating his fingers was ignored in favour of listening to laboured breathing.

She quivered beyond mere wood and metal, the fragrance of her orgasm mingling with a copper tang of blood. Ah, that was not her blood…

Sesshoumaru peeled aching fangs out from where they'd embedded into the flesh of his arm. Swallowing and panting, he dazedly watched the red substance bead and run free down to his elbow.

Kagome whimpered. "Se-Sesshoumaru...are y-you hurt?"

He couldn't answer, breathing too hard. It took everything inside him not to break and rip through every barrier between them. Take her, bind her, _hold her-_

"T-this can't go on. I've got to do something. You stay here, I'll be fine. I'll come back once it's over."

He wasn't sure what she meant by that, but the sound of glass shattering was a rude awakening. It sobered him enough to sense her presence drew away from the house, running at an alarming speed.

She shouldn't have run, that was her key mistake.

Running only excited his predatory instincts. Sesshoumaru crushed his door handle beneath his hand in an instant, ripping the door aside and bursting through its threshold.

His room lay empty, as expected. The covered tossed across his bed lay littered with evidence of what she'd been doing. He'd have buried his nose into bloodied sheets if he weren't preoccupied.

Scenting the air, magenta markings lengthened with jagged edges. Crimson eyes flashed. Wicked lips curled up into a wide mockery of a smile. Leaping into chilled air and sailing through a broken window to land on snow-covered ground outside, he hissed out a breath of steam.

Sesshoumaru lifted his head and proceeded to give chase.

* * *

Her paw prints were easy to follow in the snow, large and unique.

Sesshoumaru wasn't a demon anymore, nor a person. He was nothing. All he could feel was pure unadulterated desire and hunger. Trees passed in a blur of murky browns, greens and whites. He could hear himself panting, legs pumping. Icy ground kept meeting his hands for some reason. Was he running on all fours? The thought came and went, no more than a mere whisper quickly forgotten. His hair had loosened from its tie to fly free, the sensation of hair dancing from bitter cold breezes feeling soothing on his frayed senses.

Sesshoumaru thrust his nose up into the wind, sniffing. Where was she? Where was the female?

Slamming his claws into snow and digging in, he skidded to a stop, panting hard. Sniffing again to gain his bearings, the demon padded in a different direction, heart slamming into his ribcage. The trail couldn't have gone cold, she hadn't been that far ahead. _Where?_

His fangs ached painfully, senses straining. A hint of sweetness twined with honey flitted into frigid air- and suddenly he was bolting forward again. Madness seized him, worsening by the second the more it squeezed a tight metal cord around his lungs.

The fusty scent of a wolf joined her scent- and Sesshoumaru inwardly imploded.

A loud snarl echoed, bouncing off tree trunks and resounding through rolling hills. Youki snapped like static around his form, swelling into an inferno. He willed himself to move faster and faster, blind to everything except _her._

Bursting through thorny bushes that lashed violently from the force of his body throwing itself through them, the branches parted to reveal a sight that had his breath stilling.

A smaller wolf was circling Kagome, who had mostly transformed- ears laid flat and backing away.

If he'd had time and sense to take stock of the situation, Sesshoumaru might have realised how pitiful the males' attempts at mounting her really were. Like a corgi trying to mate a great dane. No real threat.

He didn't see any of this as his fangs were already embedded deep in the wolf's throat, causing whimpers and pitiful yelps to ring out. Kagome lurched back with a human-sounding cry seconds before powerful jaws closed down- the whimpers turning into a hoarse squeak as its windpipe was broken.

Copper tasting blood coated a rough tongue. The haze cleared from glowing crimson eyes.

"S-sesshoumaru."

She sounded scared.

Leaning his head down while opening bloodied jaws- he dropped the carcass to his paws. _Paws…_

Sesshoumaru panted wildly, licking at his sticky maw. Realisation dawned like the thrill of burning petals upon bare skin, slowly, then painful at once.

He stepped back shakily on all fours, feeling the swish of his tail and thick silky fur covering his form. Fluffy ears perked and drooped, a whine of distress weeping through his teeth.

Kagome had transformed back into a woman, shielding her naked form loosely and walking closer with concern, raising a hand.

' _STAY BACK!'_

He jolted and snarled, bearing large teeth and visibly trembling hard. The smell of ash started to reach his nose. Orange flickers of flames registered in his peripheral vision, mere ghosts of the past but bright and real to him.

Kagome stopped, gaining a wounded look upon her face. Sesshoumaru pawed at his leg roughly, willing it to change back to inhuman skin and bone. This couldn't be! He couldn't stand to be in this form! He hated it. He began to grow agitated and desperate when his own youki failed to heed his command, claws now scratching into the fur of his leg.

"Sesshoumaru it's alright-"

Bellowing out a harsh noise, silver hackles rose. _'It is not! This is unacceptable,'_ he sneered. Red eyes narrowed upon her shivering form. _'Why are you still here? I thought you were leaving?'_

"I was only trying to help!" she burst, tears pricking her eyes.

' _Just get out of here,'_ Sesshoumaru spat, more and more memories assaulting his mind by the second. _'Get out...get out, GET OUT!'_ the inuyoukai snarled, snapping his teeth. _'Leave and do not come back! You only cause me trouble! I never wanted you here in the first place!'_

Kagome flinched, stepping back. She then took another, clutching her arms tighter around herself and turning slightly. "Remember to breathe," she murmured thinly, before leaping away and transforming mid-air with a finesse he would've been proud of in the past.

Sesshoumaru watched the black wolf disappear between the trees, closing his eyes and lowering himself to the ground, grappling with warring senses. His instincts demanded he chase the female in heat, the strong, favourable one who was more than his equal- but everything else hurt. Pain exploded behind closed lids. How could he think of more pups when he could remember holding the small, ashen weight of Koji in his hands?

As the world turned on its axis and he fought not to shamefully cry out and betray his roots as a Daiyoukai, a gentle voice brushed through his mind.

' _Remember to breathe.'_

Such a small action felt impossible, but he slowly locked his jaws tight together and started breathing through his nose. In and out. Inhale and exhale. Slowly, hold it- release. Claws dug into snowy ground. Fur shuddered. Burning lungs recovered at a steady pace as he began inhaling through his nose then out through his mouth.

Groaning lowly, Sesshoumaru caught his breath. Tired lids peeled open. Instead of heat, he felt doused in cold. Bereft.

Standing on two trembling legs like a newborn fawn, silver hair lashed around him from a breeze that carried Kagome's fading scent. Bare skin pricked. Exhaling a visible breath, Sesshoumaru began to shakily walk back the way he'd come.

He felt burned out. Worn thin. It had been around five centuries since his last real transformation.

The more steps he took, the more strength and control returned, and Sesshoumaru summoned pure white energy to his body, cloaking his nude form in warmth. Flying through the air as a large speeding orb, he returned to the hollow comforts of home alone.

* * *

Patching up his broken bedroom window and covering it over to keep the cold out, Sesshoumaru dryly observed that at least his house wouldn't suffer any more damages with her gone.

Sitting down in the worn armchair that smelled of Kagome, he set both hands on the armrests and glanced around.

Had it… always been so quiet?

Frowning to himself, Sesshoumaru drummed his fingers against the leather. He stayed like this for a total of two agonising minutes before pushing off from the chair and grabbing a book.

It had been like this before she'd come, if he recalled right. He'd used to lie in the dark for hours sometimes, listening to pure silence, unable to turn his brain off. So he read. It took him away to far off worlds, and eventually his mind would quiet enough that he'd sleep. Routine had helped. Simple work that kept his hands busy; and so he'd worked on the cabin, over and over again.

 _I wonder if she's alright,_ he thought, eyes glued to a passage. Had he turned the page once yet? Sesshoumaru shook himself, trying to read on.

It wasn't as though he'd been heading there with the intent to help her. She was safer away from him too.

Sesshoumaru shut the book with an audible noise, pushing it back into place on the shelf. Clearly that wasn't working.

Music? No, that reminded him of her.

Ah, he knew just the thing.

Sesshoumaru filled the fireplace, loading it full with wood. Setting it alight, he took a seat before the flickering flames, watching with rapt attention. The fire kept him in a strange state of Limbo. It reminded him of the night he'd lost everything. Despite that, in an odd way it had become a comfort, the only warmth available to him for hundreds of years.

He didn't feel empty though right then, nothing like a man suspended in a monotonous routine as he'd used to be. He felt wide awake and unable to be pacified into the fog of numb regret.

She was out there alone, perhaps fending herself off from unwanted attention.

Sesshoumaru squeezed his eyes shut.

That small wolf hadn't been a demon or werewolf, just a regular brown animal. What had it been doing there, sniffing at her?

Gritting his teeth, clawed fingers bit into his ankles.

_Just breathe. Forget her. Sleep. Dream-_

_"Are you OK? You look like you're going to throw up."_

Sesshoumaru opened his eyes, confusion knitting his brow. This memory…was it real? He couldn't recall her ever saying that to him before. Slowly lulling himself back into a peaceful, empty place, the snapped strings of forgotten conversations wove back together.

_Kagome stood in the doorway to his room, skinny. The shirt she'd worn on her second night there barely hid her thin willowy frame, blue eyes were slightly wide. "Was it a nightmare?"_

_His hand lifted slightly, and she moved closer to take it. Once Kagome was in range, however, that hand grasped her wrist in a flash._ _With a yank and a yelp, the woman landed atop him, nose bumping his._

" _S-Sesshoumaru," she said thinly, blue eyes widening upon looking up. "I-I think you're still half asleep. I should go back to my bed-"_

" _Stay."_

" _What?"_

_His voice shuddered, arms locking tight around her. "Stay….do not leave."_

_Kagome stiffened, shifting atop his chest. Gazing at him and seeming to note the trembling in his limbs, she gentled. A hesitant hand found silver bangs, combing through them gently and straying to a striped cheek._

_She was lost to his hazy sight as long lashes fluttered shut. With a rumbling noise of pleasure, Sesshoumaru tipped his head into the soft, comforting touch, feeling starved of it. She kindly indulged him. Keeping up her gentle caresses, she shifted closer when he continued shuddering. Tucking her head beneath his chin and splaying her body over his, Kagome's protective pose instinctively soothed his battle-worn nerves, allowing the Daiyoukai to slip into a blissful sleep._

_Safe._

Sesshoumaru frowned, but that wasn't the end of it. He could recall vague snippets now, like how he'd been moving through the house at ungodly hours in the morning for some reason. Kagome had been laying secure and comfy within her next of furs in the living room and he-

Golden eyes widened.

_She started and stared up at him, sighing quietly and peeling back the lush bedding. "Oh boy, you sleepwalk now?"_

_He'd been unresponsive, except for reaching down and unceremoniously picking her up, holding her against him._

" _Hey! What are you doing!" Kagome squeaked. "Last night was all very well and good but that can't happen again, hey are you listening?! Gahh I guess not," she tried wriggling, finding it useless as he turned and began walking back upstairs with his precious cargo. Kagome valiantly kept struggling, sighing and resting her head against his shoulder. "I don't mind but you certainly will in the morning. You sure you still wanna snuggle?"_

_His sleep induced state seemed very much in favour of this, pushing open the door with his foot and placing her on the bed._

_Kagome heaved another sigh but smiled and wrapped her arms around him willingly for another night of warmth and closeness._

It seemed that no matter what he'd tried by day, Sesshoumaru by night thwarted easily. It was he who had turned the locks open to his bedroom, walking downstairs yet again in search of that sweet scent and those kind hands.

Every night his body had arisen as though possessed, wandering in search of something inexplicable. It didn't have to wander far. Eventually, Kagome wrapped her arms around his neck while he carried her up the stairs in his dreaming state. Hot breath tickled his neck as she giggled lightly.

" _Alright," she murmured into a pointed ear. "You win."_

Sesshoumaru opened his eyes and stared at the flickering flames in the hearth. All that time. All those nights spent together had been out of kindness. What's more, she'd let him maintain his pride, not breathed a word of it. He winced upon remembering how he'd reprimanded her for sleeping next to him.

 _You're a singular woman, Kagome_ , he thought, lashes lowering as his lips curved into a rueful half-smirk.

He was such a fool. The worst. He'd really let a woman in heat just run off on her own when a wolf demon was out there looking for a quick rut. What was he doing? He was wasting time. It wasn't her fault he'd transformed, she couldn't help her heat. More than anything, Kagome's existence was precious to him- something to be protected and cherished.

Coiling youki around him, Sesshoumaru stood.

_I'm coming. Forgive me for the delay, but I am on my way, Kagome._

Short claws lengthened. _Hold on until then._

With a burst of speed, he blurred through the air and into his basement, pulling aside a few old boxes and lifting out a black lacquer case, opening it.

His palm ran over exquisitely soft, red and white silks nostalgically- grasping them tight and lifting them out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: attempted sexual assault
> 
> Also smut which features knotting. Told ya there would be werewolf tropes.

Hopefully she'd laid low, found a cave to hide in until her heat passed. His clan used to insist upon a female shutting herself away during the duration her heat cycle while the males kept guard until it was over- unless of course, she wanted to breed with her mate. Women were precious, but instincts could become hazy, ugly things. Sesshoumaru scowled at having scorned her so shamefully.

Flying through powdery white skies thick with snow, clouds coiled at his feet. Silver hair flowed loose as he focused on following the broken trail of Kagome's scent.

The chilled air made it difficult to track anything from above. He needed to descend.

Gliding down dressed in his former glory of a splendid red and white hankimono with its billowing sleeves, crisp underlayer and white hakama pants, Sesshoumaru landed with a crunch of boots on snow.

Straightening and standing tall, the demon took a breath.

He then let everything flow loose. Hot youki spiralled as skin became fur. Hands curled into fists before morphing into paws. A muzzle lengthened out, and Sesshoumaru burst into a run on all fours. The sensation brought back vague, horrid images and sounds- trees burning alight around him- demons screaming. His paws had thundered fast and hard that day. Embers raced over his fur. Fallen trees blocked his path so he'd lept over them, running further into smoke filled territory, approaching the Western Stronghold- only to see it on fire, being consumed with everything else he held dear.

Panting raggedly, Sesshoumaru squeezed his eyes shut so tight he saw stars. Now was not the time. Hayami, his mate, would likely dislike him trying to forget her. She'd been the vengeful sort, their union an arranged marriage. However she'd been quite beautiful; passionate and cold in her ruthlessness. Yes, she and little Koji, their small son born too tiny...they would have to be put aside. He could not forget them entirely, could not forget the regret of never holding his son while he'd been alive for fear of hurting him due to his size. Technically, he'd never even held a baby. However, he couldn't afford to let their ghosts cloud his judgement anymore, lest it affect the life of a new person who had become precious to him.

Sesshoumaru regulated his breathing, pumping strong legs harder. Slowly, the scent of smoke receded, and bright orange flames died down around him. It was just him in the snowy forest alone, searching, running desperately. His own pants sounded too loud in his ears.

 _Kagome_ , he inhaled. She'd fled a great distance and appeared to be heading towards a small rocky mountain.

Something laying in the vast white landscape stretching on ahead caught his attention, and the Daiyoukai skidded to a stop beside it.

The broken body of a wolf lay on its side, throat torn out.

Sesshoumaru frowned, sniffing it. Just as before, it was a regular male wolf. What's more, it hadn't been killed by Kagome, but another male. Incredibly large paw prints were stamped around the body, belonging to something large and inhuman.

What was going on? It looked the same as the one that had been mildly bothering Kagome earlier. If he recalled right, Wolf Demons commanded packs of regular wolves, who did their alpha's bidding.

Were these wolves from Kouga's pack? And if so…why would he turn on his brethren? Sniffing, Sesshoumaru identified the large paw prints as belonging to that elusive scent that he'd lost by the river some time ago. It was most definitely not Kouga's foul smell.

Red glowing eyes narrowed, and he pushed off the earth to leap a great distance, starting to push himself faster with more urgency. The more ground he covered- the more bodies of fallen wolves he came across.

Kouga was up ahead, as he'd figured. He could smell him now, a blemish of animalistic scent on clean and clear air. Finally reaching the beginnings of a craggy hill that led upwards towards a steep incline of rocks beginning to form the mountain base, Sesshoumaru took the air.

Following air currents and clearing a large distance in a single bound, harsh winds began lashing at his silver coat and ears. Hearing a faint whine further above, he snarled and forced more power out along his legs, climbing higher into the frost-bitten breeze.

Iron reached his senses. Blood.

Crimson eyes flashed. _Kagome's blood._

He probably would've felt nauseous if he weren't so preoccupied with being enraged. He was going to kill them. Whoever they were, he was going to tear the bastard limb from limb.

Flying alongside a cliff face and finally reaching a reprieve of flat rock, Sesshoumaru stilled at the sight awaiting him.

Kouga had collapsed, his twitching form laying in white snow-streaked crimson. Other, smaller wolves gingerly looped around the fighting pair, some trying to nudge Kouga awake.

Rather than him attacking Kagome- as Sesshoumaru had suspected- a stocky, large grey wolf was snapping his jaws at her, their bodies colliding and scrapping. Kagome's sleek black form resisted, her teeth finding his neck and digging in. Snarling loudly, he shoved her off with a slash of sharp claws to her chest. Yelping, she hit the ground seconds before his great form lowered itself to hover over her. His front paws resembled long-fingered hands, and they gripped her waist, angling slim hips up to mount her from behind.

Sesshoumaru's hackles raised. Terror gripped his throat. He let out a bellowing, feral noise, spittle frothing at his teeth he could not contain his fury.

Blue eyes snapped up. Kagome's ears perked, and she let out a faint whimper. The male behind her snarled possessively.

Something about the sight of Sesshoumaru seemed to rejuvenate her frightened gaze, just for a moment. White teeth flashed seconds before Kagome transformed back into a woman. With the change in size, she was able to twist her body beneath the male's to lay on her back- turning into a wolf once more and lunging large powerful jaws into his jugular. The action sent the grey male rearing back in outrage, and Sesshoumaru was on him in an instant.

Shoving him down and tearing hungry teeth into his hide- furious, pained sounds filled their ears.

The male kicked him off and backed up, panting as blood dripped free.

"He- he's the one," Kagome's voice reached Sesshoumaru from behind him. "He's the werewolf who bit me."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened fractionally. Blood trailed from the stocky male's neck, who paced a little away from him, quietly biding his time and gauging when to attack. He didn't smell like a wolf demon, and his figure at odd angles resembled a human man's torso.

_I see. This is the male that was looping around my territory, not Kouga._

He must have been tracking Kagome for some time. _Why_ remained to be seen, but it didn't matter. Sesshoumaru braced himself as the male bent his legs, preparing to spring forward.

Leaping into the air and meeting him halfway, Sesshoumaru snarled- their teeth colliding as jaws were knocked back from seeking each others throats.

Claws scraped and cut into thick fur and flesh. Letting acid leak from his mouth and trying again with a quick and deadly lunge at the males flank- the grey werewolf dodged. His speed proved impressive.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Ears perking, he glanced over his shoulder. Kagome nodded towards the edge of the cliff, and he caught the meaning in her eyes.

Exhaling a plume of steam through spittle coated teeth, Sesshoumaru focused. Youki rolled thicker through his bloodstream and expelled from silver fur. Bones shifted, muscles expanding.

He'd often used to transform into a smaller version of his true form for convenience; his current height resembling a large horse. However, it was pitiful in comparison to the demon's true size. Feeding more and more power into his body and growing larger, taller, Sesshoumaru's eyes smiled with savage bloodlust as his shadow swallowed the werewolf in sheer scale.

The male's tail dropped between his legs. Nonetheless, he snarled and jumped with every intent of ripping into him savagely. With a single turn, Sesshoumaru slammed his paw into the werewolf's chest, sending him hurtling over the cliff's side.

Lowering his head to watch, golden eyes followed the werewolf's progression as he plummeted like a stone. Sesshoumaru remained a passive observer until his foe hit the ground far below, twitching once, before lying still.

Panting and feeling various places on his body prick from cold air attacking exposed wounds, he allowed youki to flow out. It cloaked around him until he stood in humanoid form once more, glancing at Kagome.

Quivering in place, the woman trembled on the ground. Blood littered the snow. Her hips and back appeared to be strewn with bite marks.

Dark hair danced in the breeze, obscuring her face. Blue eyes found him through the wild strands when he took a knee and draped his white and red patterned hankimono around shaking shoulders, enclosing her in silks.

Kagome touched his hand, brows drawing together. She opened her mouth to say something, but he cut her off.

"I apologise."

She swallowed, curling blue-tinged fingers around his wrist. "It's okay…"

"No it is not," he uttered in a crisp, clear voice. "You were attempting to put distance between us. The fault lies with me for transforming and overreacting."

"Getting triggered over a past trauma isn't overreacting, Sesshoumaru."

Inhuman eyes warmed. "Hn," summoning his old furs to one hand and curling them around her for good measure, he stood and offered a hand. "Come, you should get out of the cold."

"But my heat cycle hasn't ended."

"This one will control himself," Sesshoumaru vowed sternly. When she still hesitated, some emotion leaked into his tone. "Come home, Kagome."

Biting her lip and swallowing, her mouth bent into a fond smile. She slid a hand into his own carefully just as a groan reached their hearing.

Kouga grunted, sitting up and petting one of his lingering wolves. "Gn...what the fuck?" he winced, holding the back of his head tenderly.

Kagome stood, clutching the clothing tight against her and turning slightly. "Let's go," she murmured to the Daiyoukai, who obliged. Wrapping an arm around her waist, white powdery mists collected to their feet, solidifying into clouds.

"Wait!" Kouga called, grunting and standing with a stagger. "K-Kagome, that other guy was just a distraction but don't let him spoil this. I'd be a great mate to you. I could help ya. As my woman, you'd be treated like a Queen! Don't go with that old guy."

Sesshoumaru didn't outwardly react, watching Kagome shift and look back at the wolf demon chief.

"Kouga, you didn't know me before you decided on your own that I was yours. It's not happening, alright?" her gaze softened. "I'm sorry about your comrades, but I'm going home now. I want to return to the place where I felt beautiful and...seen, instead of afraid of my own shadow."

Surprise registered on Kouga's features, the stubborn set of his jaw returning soon after. Sesshoumaru set a hand on the hilt of his sword, lips thinning.

"Wolf," the word was spat like poison. "This one will resurrect your kin. In exchange, you will never set foot in my territory again. You will leave her be."

Kouga rested his elbows on his knees, sighing and scratching a wolf fondly behind her ear. "Well, when ya put it like that I don't have much of a choice. Fine, deal."

Inclining his head, Sesshoumaru said nothing more, flying over the edge of the cliff with Kagome pressed firmly against his side. She let out a yelp and clung to him tightly, so he soon straightened out and smoothed an aristocratic nose into her hair. Inhaling her sweet fragrance by the lungful, he sighed.

She still smelled incredibly tempting, arousing- but her wounds and fear were registering enough in his head not to be overcome by baser instincts again.

Kagome pressed her face against his chest, faint tremors shuddering her body every so often. He wondered if she were thinking of the grey wolf, and lowered his voice.

"I must ascertain his fate."

She nodded mutely, forcing herself to look at the werewolf's fallen corpse once they finally reached the ground. He was no more than flesh and bones, no life left in him. Sesshoumaru turned away from it with disgust, starting to resurrect the wolves from Kouga's pack whenever they happened upon them on the trail.

Kagome eyed Tenseiga's blade with interest, the metal glowing a faint blue.

"Did you bring that because you thought I might be…" she trailed off.

Golden eyes slid down to her. "Heat cycles can drive males to madness, though that is no excuse for this," a hand slid lightly over the curve of her hip where spots of red dotted through the white clothing. His eyes were gentle upon her face. "Losing you was never an option."

Tears rolled down pale cheeks, Kagome huddling closer during the remainder of the flight back to the cabin, silent and still. It unnerved him, but he understood. She must have endured a lot of fear before he'd arrived. He could practically feel the exhaustion latent in her bones. He wanted to assure her, as she had him during the long nights. Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.

_You are safe now._

* * *

Kicking open the door to his home and filling his fireplace once more, Sesshoumaru went about heating the cabin before tending to Kagome's wounds. Nasty gashes and teeth marks littered her flesh, dried blood caking flushed skin. He took a cloth and warm water to the damaged areas on her back, Kagome pressing his silks against her chest to preserve what little modesty she had left.

The water quickly dyed red from her blood, and she winced every so often. It was a painstaking, long process, the silence sounding too loud. At some point, her chattering teeth and tiny, repressed whimpers gnawed at him too deeply. Sesshoumaru let out a rumbling noise he intended to be comforting, lowering himself slightly.

His tongue came, warm and wet. A soft, winding drag over bruising, abused areas, mapping out all the places where she needed tenderness and care.

Kagome's breath hitched and she soon sighed, tipping her head back. His lips found her neck too at the inadvertent offering. Then her collarbone, her chest. Sesshoumaru didn't think of it as a sexual thing despite what he was doing and the heady scent saturating the air like heavy cigarette smoke clogging his lungs. He merely sought to make love to her wounds, kissing and licking damaged, ugly blemishes patterning her exquisite form.

Kagome's hands soon curled into his hair, halting him. "Sesshoumaru," she said in an intimate, quiet tone. "Will you hold me? Just hold me for now."

Nodding slowly, as though roused from a dream, he straightened and lifted her into his lap so that her legs fell to one side over his knee, her body securely held against him.

"I was not attempting to-"

"I know," she smiled tiredly, reaching up and smoothing a thumb over his jawline. Resting her head against his arm, Kagome sighed. "Isn't this agony for you though? Despite what happened, I still feel squirmy and needy."

He let out a controlled breath, brushing his lips feather-light over her fingertips. "I will hold whatever baser inclinations I have at bay by focusing on your wounds. Even a potential mate lost in a blood haze should notice a suffering female. It was shameful to lose control as I did."

Kagome drew her gaze away, withdrawing her touch. "You're not the only one who did. All the guys went crazy. It was… ridiculously scary."

Sesshoumaru's fingers tightened around her waist, soon gentling due to her injuries. "Will you tell me what happened?"

Doleful eyes looked at the fire, shifting to observe him instead. He wondered if something about his face was comforting to her.

"After you sent me away, I kept running. Kouga eventually caught up with me, saying that we should mate and stuff. I refused and he kept tailing me. Even so…I got the feeling he could've outrun me easily, caught me at any time. But he didn't. Then we heard these terrible cries coming from the back of his wolf pack," she murmured. "It was a familiar scent. I knew him instantly, you know like how the smell of something burning just suddenly raises mild alarm bells in your head? That was him. My stomach dropped. I could see him picking up and tearing those wolves apart. He swung one into a tree and broke its back. Kouga kept attacking him right up until we reached that rocky place where you found us. Kouga got knocked out and then that guy was circling me. He said… he said that he didn't intend to make a female werewolf but I'm the only survivor of his attacks so he felt I belonged to him. When I said no that's when he, well you know," she glanced at her ribs where dark purple bruises lay.

Anger brimmed beneath the surface of his placid expression. Sesshoumaru rested his chin atop her head, combing claws absentmindedly through the ends of her hair.

Kagome snuggled closer and let out a sigh, lapsing into a comfortable silence.

She picked at his silky clothing after a little while, "pretty sweet threads. Where did you get them?"

He chuckled quietly, "these were what I wore many centuries ago. The silks were spun from spider youkai webs and do not tear despite transformation between forms."

Kagome's mouth formed an 'o' of understanding. "I see. They're lovely, but…" she shifted and looked up at him, grazing a lingering hand down his chest. "I don't know if they suit you anymore. It's difficult to describe."

"Hn, they have had their time," he observed them with nostalgia. "However, are you saying you prefer me in plaid shirts to priceless Japanese silks?" golden eyes danced.

Kagome giggled, "you know you're beautiful either way."

His foolish heart thudded a little faster at her words. How pitiful. She could affect his moods so easily. Carefully extracting her from his lap once it became apparent she was dozing off, Sesshoumaru carried her upstairs and tucked the woman into bed.

He had to remove himself and stretch out before the fire. A sleepless night awaited him. Rest proved unobtainable, his body humming alive and watchful. He couldn't relax, still spreading his senses out and listening for any flicker of danger. There was also the pressing matter of Kagome's heat cycle. Muscles remained taut and stiff. Continuous heat and desire kept cycling back down towards his lower abdomen.

Rising in the early hours of dawn with the sun just barely poking its head over the horizon, Sesshoumaru stood in his pantry. He held a cup of dried herbs in one hand, jaw clenching.

"What are they?"

His eyes slanted to the woman lingering in the doorway, bed hair sticking up in odd places endearingly. Her approach had been silent. His lips quirked. She was getting better at hunting.

"Nothing, just herbs for tea."

Kagome frowned, clutching a blanket about her shoulders, "you're lying. What do they do?"

Exhaling through his nose, Sesshoumaru set them down. "They would allow me to...bed a female without the danger of pregnancy."

Her expression slowly changed with a multitude of moods. "So like contraceptive tea?"

"Hn."

Kagome grit her teeth, blue eyes flashing. "And you've had this all along? We could've used that days ago but you kept it to yourself?"

The snap in her tone caused him to raise a brow. "You are upset? It is for your sake that I did not bring it up-"

Storming over, she grabbed the cup of herbs and spun on her heel. Moving around the kitchen with barely concealed, agitated movements and grumbling under her breath, she brought some water to a boil.

He watched with mild surprise, a little dumbstruck as she glared at him. "So you kept us in agony for what reason?"

"Heat cycles can influence behaviour. I did not intend to take advantage."

Kagome groaned and massaged her brow, giving a broken laugh and looking at him tiredly. "Oh boy, you're such an idiot for someone supposedly centuries old. Don't you get that I've been pretty much besotted with you, stupid demon? The heat cycle wouldn't be the reason why I'd want you, I already do- I have...for some time. Haven't I been stupidly obvious?"

She had. He just hadn't wanted to acknowledge it. Not wanted to admit that he desired her too, more than just a partner to fuck. He wanted something enduring and lasting- a promise she guaranteed within the depths of her deep blue eyes.

Kagome's expression became a little sad. "I didn't want to say anything because I thought you weren't ready. If I'm making you uncomfortable I can stop-" her hand reached for the kettle to remove it from the heat.

"Boil the water."

Her thighs pressed together at his steady tone. Sesshoumaru had turned stone still, new sensations coursing through his veins; anticipation. He shook his head slightly, "your wounds…"

"They're healing fast," she murmured, turning back to the tea. Her fingers shook a little. "I want to feel you. We can...go slow, right? It doesn't have to hurt..."

"Yes," the words escaped him in a velvety rush. Sesshoumaru stood behind her then, grazing pale knuckles over the back of her neck. Goosebumps raised where he'd touched.

Kagome swallowed and finished preparing the tea, though it didn't exactly look pretty, more like mint leaves stewing in water.

Sesshoumaru accepted it from her and took a sip, attempting to drink more and wincing.

"Don't burn your tongue," Kagome giggled, red blooming on her cheeks. "Are you eager or something?" she asked, sitting down at the table.

He hummed, joining her. "Perhaps. More than a little bit."

This only caused her to blush harder. She refolded her legs and he caught it. Sesshoumaru knew then that he wasn't the only one, and he made no attempt to hide his smug grin.

Kagome huffed, bumping her ankle against his. "Drink your tea, silly."

It was an incredibly bizarre thing; the time between taking precautions and engaging in actual sex. More so since they hadn't even kissed yet. Sesshoumaru stared at her across the table, noting the light from dawn catching on waves of gorgeous curling hair. Clad in his silks and fidgeting every so often, he doubted this was how she'd intended to lose her virginity. She deserved to be excited and treated reverently.

Grabbing the cup and downing the hot beverage, Sesshoumaru ignored the fire it ignited in his throat along with Kagome's protests, pushing off from his seat and bridging the distance between them by reaching across the table. Grabbing the silks and yanking to force her to her feet, his lips slanted over hers.

Kagome squeaked, before giving a muffled noise of amusement. She pressed back against him but pulled away after a moment. He was about to ask what was wrong- until Kagome leapt backwards onto her chair and pushed off to bounce onto the table with a single step- taking another in order to lean down and wrap her legs around his waist, hands descending to his shoulders. He caught her about the waist with a startled grunt.

Giggling, Kagome took the opportunity to pepper the plains of his severe face with kisses. Sesshoumaru grumbled, carrying her back to the living room and catching her lips a few times, exchanging heated, clumsy kisses.

Kneeling before the fireplace and cradling the back of her head, Sesshoumaru indulged himself in her deeper. Leaning over her body- that sweet scent coming from between her thighs began to haze all senses. The tight sensation of her legs squeezing around his waist to keep them anchored together sent arousal coursing south down his abdomen. Her heat cycle didn't help matters.

His red and white silks were flung open over her chest to bare full breasts that fit nicely into his hands.

His fingers slid up until he found her nipple. Her entire body went rigid as his index finger brushed across it. It pebbled and hardened instantly at his touch. Her breathing began to pick up and blue eyes found his, cheeks flushing red before Kagome ducked her head to his flesh.

Her mouth was a wicked thing, dragging over the line of his jaw to slide to the delicate skin of his throat. Her lips massaged over his pulse, soon delivering a punishing bite. He groaned appreciatively.

Strong hands latched onto squirming hips, hot breath fanning quickly over her mouth. "If you keep moving like that, this will not last long."

"That's okay," Kagome said in a rush, grinding on his lap again and eliciting a hiss. "We can do it more than once, right?"

Sesshoumaru wondered why she felt the need to ask, was it not obvious he desired to keep her? He hummed, dragging his tongue over the shell of her ear and nibbling- giving a low noise when she moaned and wriggled. By now his cock had hardened eagerly like some whelp anticipating his first rut. Luckily Kagome didn't seem to mind, rubbing herself against him with flushed cheeks and mouth erotically open. He leaned forward and bit her tempting bottom lip, causing her to yelp and dig claws into his shoulders, starting to tug his own clothing aside.

When his chest was bared, gentle, inquisitive hands touched and dragged down heated skin, stroking along his abdomen that tightened and fluttered with the scrape of her nails.

He bit her lip again, nudging her with his nose, asking her for another kiss. Kagome's eyes danced and she turned her face away playfully.

Sesshoumaru growled- a whine most definitely not leaking into his tone. He shoved her to lay back onto the furs he'd slept on, their lower halves practically glued together. The outline of his cock tenting through his pants pressed intimately close between her legs.

He rolled his hips with lazy athleticism, ensuring she felt every inch. Kagome jolted and moaned, gasping out a plea; "more Sesshoumaru- _please._ "

"I think you owe me something first," he purred, leaning over her and hooking long claws beneath her ass to rut her body all the more against his.

Kagome panted and whined. With a breathy huff- soft lips pressed against his, taking it further by brushing a supple tongue into his mouth. In reward, Sesshoumaru slid a free hand down her navel and minded the loose tie of her obi aside to cup his fingers between her legs, finding her already slick and bare; ready. His cock twitched and strained painfully. She was wet and slick as sin, feverishly hot and incredibly responsive. He adored it. Adored her.

Two clawed fingers carefully rubbed her clit, manipulating her body to hear lewd music like she was an instrument to be played.

Kagome threaded her hands tight in silver hair, rolling needy hips and mewling. When an eager thrust sent his claws dangerously close to cutting her- he withdrew his fingers. A snarl immediately swept through the room, her face having partially transformed.

Sesshoumaru's lips peeled back in silent warning, rumbling and bringing his fingers to her mouth. "I do not wish to hurt you, foolish woman."

She had the grace to look mildly embarrassed, face returning to normal. A pink tongue peeked out between her lips, sweeping over sharp nails and taking slick digits into her mouth.

Golden eyes widened as Kagome bit at his nails, growling. "Shorten these, then you won't."

Chuckling quietly, he withdrew his fingers and bit at his claws to blunt them, returning them to her clit to become a firm caress. They then slid inside and began to pump slowly.

Kagome jolted- a gasp caught up in her throat. She tilted her head back, lips parting to reveal elongated fangs. "Mnn- _ah!_ "

Bringing his head down to her chest, Sesshoumaru observed her with a hooded, arrogant gaze, before closing his mouth over a rosy nipple and sucking.

The throaty moan she emitted only aggravated the brewing tempest inside him. Scraping hungry teeth down her abdomen, he pressed his face against her sex and inhaled a lungful of her arousal, making Kagome jump- before a tongue joined his fingers, flicking inside her. Kagome cried out with rapture, wriggling needy hips in an attempt to ride his tongue. A black tail swept out to rest beside her, thumping a little.

Sesshoumaru withdrew to circle a wet, probing trail over her clit, lapping at the bundle of nerves and driving her crazy with a satisfied smirk. Kagome snarled and whined, face a picture of decadence. "I'm so close, don't tease me."

Ah, he'd forgotten how good it felt to be wicked. But her hard grip in his hair made him think twice about denying her, and besides, he ultimately wanted her satisfied. Freeing himself from his pants and stroking his length, Sesshoumaru didn't do as anticipated, instead grazing his tongue over her clit once more. Getting adorably impatient, Kagome growled and attempted to move away- but a hand locked on her tail and dragged her back.

"Ah! Jerk!" she growled.

"Impatient woman," Sesshoumaru muttered. Shoving his face to her sex, his tongue forced its way inside her slick folds, suddenly growing longer and larger. His muzzle elongated, markings becoming jagged and eyes flashing red as he fucked her with his tongue. Kagome stilled and opened her mouth in a silent gasp, back arching. The scrape of his teeth at her entrance only heightened raw animalistic pleasure and she cried out, bucking her hips- rubbing his nose against her clit.

A low growl from the Daiyoukai sent vibrations running through her system and it was enough to send Kagome off the edge, mewling loudly as she orgasmed. Grunting as she came on his tongue, he lapped up her sticky juices willingly. The heady tang of her heat overtook all senses. Sesshoumaru panted, suddenly grabbing her hips and yanking to force Kagome onto her stomach.

She suddenly lost her wolf-ish features, tail, fangs and claws disappearing as Kagome yelped and glanced at him over her shoulder, suddenly very human and vulnerable. Blue eyes were wide as his length ground against her bare, dripping sex.

"S-sesshoumaru..." she said faintly. It was not the tone of a woman lost in lust.

Surfacing from his instincts just a touch, Sesshoumaru rumbled apologetically, leaning over her scarred back to nuzzle his face against her neck. "I am not like those other males who pursued you. Tell me to stop now if you do not want it."

"I-I do but...this angle made me remember his weight atop me. It was..." she struggled to find the words. Sesshoumaru licked at a reddened cheek and hummed, laying down on his side behind her and spreading her thigh high to nestle his cock at her entrance. Sliding an arm beneath her waist to press his muscled chest to her back and kissing wild black hair, he revelled in her pleased noise.

"Better?"

"Much," she sighed with relief, sliding an arm up and over her shoulder to curl in silver hair. Nestling the head of his cock inside her, Kagome surprised him by willingly angling her hips down and sheathing him partially inside. Twin gasps and hisses of discomfort rolled into the room. It was a tight fit. And warm. Sesshoumaru attempted to sink further in but Kagome only tightened into a blindingly vice-like grip and he realised she was tense. Muffling a groan in her hair, Sesshoumaru lifted a hand to her chin and turned her face to pepper kisses against her cheek and lips.

"It is just me," he panted softly. "A demon with- _hah_ \- bad taste in music and fashion. You do not need to be afraid. I'm here with you."

Kagome steadily relaxed, letting out a small whimper mixed with a giggle. "Bad t-taste? You have no taste!" she smiled weakly, returning his kisses gently. She exhaled and nodded then, and he started to thrust his hips slowly. The result let him gradually push deeper, locking most of his cock inside twitching walls.

"Move with me," he said in a low, cajoling voice.

Letting out a keening noise, she ground back against him, making sinfully delightful sounds as he moved inside her.

Kagome slid a hand behind her and grasped his striped hip, holding it and trying to urge him to pick up the pace. "E-earlier," she groaned. "Was it yesterday? Hah...I don't remember- but when I was inside your room, locked away while you protected the house, I heard you."

Sesshoumaru shuddered at her breathy words, licking her ear and sucking on the shell as he bucked harder, jostling her body.

"Mn! Hah! You touched yourself the same time I did- it was so weirdly hot. I could smell everything," her melodic voice changed, tinged with something hungry. Sesshoumaru spied her toe-nails lengthening and digging into the furs. "You must've really wanted me then," she purred, a smile in her voice as she became influenced by instinct. "You want me just as bad now, right? Show me."

It was when Kagome playfully attempted to inch her body away that she seemed to notice it properly. His genitalia had swelled and bulged in a way that physically locked him inside her. There would be no stopping. No playing nor chasing. This was it, she was within the hungry jaws of the demon.

Blue eyes strayed back, finding him through the haze of their lovemaking. Sweat beaded and rolled down his brow. Lips were curled back to expose large fangs. Gold eyes flashed red in short, quick bursts. It physically hurt to hold himself back from pinning her down and rutting like a wild animal- he could not form a response. Kagome gentled and paused, before moaning encouragingly, holding his hip and inching herself slightly to tip towards laying on her stomach.

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened- but he accepted her silent permission with relief. Rolling their bodies in an instant- Sesshoumaru settled behind her, hands grabbing her ass as he thrust lean hips forward, burying himself within her dripping sex to the hilt. Kagome cried out.

Thin lips pressed hard against her ear, hot breath hissing fast between clenched teeth and making her hair dance. "Very well, woman. I will show you."

When he started moving, they began to shudder and tremble. They shared their pleasure vocally, loudly. There was nothing else for it as they intrinsically understood what it was they were feeling.

 _Perfection._ It was exquisite. Her body accommodated him so easily it was like they'd been crafted by the Kami as a pair for this intended purpose.

Velvet and molten heat, that was what she felt like. Kagome was as soft as liquid beneath his body and sleek, petite compared to him yet solid and lean. Satin on skin. He tried to contain the pleasure surging through him. He had never been so hard. He ground against her, hips rolling pleasure into her core, thumb working her clit in a frenzy. Their noises began to bleed into feral grunts, whines and panting snarls of pleasure. Claws lengthened and dragged on flesh and fur.

The spike was coming, a sweet thrum deep in his belly that wasn't just residual ache.

He could read the signs easily that she was crashing towards another release. The fluttering of her walls, the frantic hands that didn't know what to do as they clawed at the destroyed furs beneath her, the keens and whimpers that left her throat, hips grinding against his as though possessed. It was all perfect and humbling to witness; he would never trade this for anything. He wanted it, always. Wanted her.

She crashed into an orgasm, holding him in with the press of her thighs, fingers digging into the arm around her waist and nothing to muffle her screams.

Slamming his cock inside of her fully anew, he felt his balls tighten and a tension radiate across his lower back.

She gripped him so tightly it became hard to breathe. Her burning, clenching cunt contracted like a vice around his knot as he jerked inside of her, filling her to the brim with his seed.

Sesshoumaru kept coming inside of her longer than a human would. The feeling was one long lost to him- now rediscovered as a blinding, favourable pastime. Yes, they'd be doing this again, _many times_. Panting worn, ragged breaths, he stared down at Kagome's twitching, collapsed form on the furs. Sweat glistened on her back, dark hair lying damp and limp.

They were still tied together, so he shifted off her so that they were both lying on their sides.

When the swelling finally eased enough that he was able to slip out of her, Sesshoumaru turned Kagome to face him. Half lidded, deep blue eyes blinked at him tiredly. She lifted a hand- which he immediately claimed, pulling her in closer and nuzzling an aristocratic nose into her dark locks, crooning softly. Kagome gave an answering happy noise, kissing his throat.

"You didn't...mate me."

Why did she sound disappointed? It had taken all his willpower not to.

"I am attempting to 'go slow' as you put it."

"Y-yeah...that's probably the right thing to do. It's just instincts talking," she mumbled.

Sesshoumaru ran the pads of his fingers over her lower back, gliding them lightly over still healing wounds. "How about this; we will mate when you perfect your transformation without the use of the full moon."

Kagome gasped lightly. "How dare, my transformation is almost perfect as it is thank you very much."

"Then you will not have to wait long to have your wish granted of becoming my mate, now will you?"

Giving a tired laugh, she snuggled closer, tucking her head beneath his chin. Their legs slid together, ankles crossing. Sesshoumaru wrapped an arm possessively around her waist, rumbling contentedly. She made a small sigh before slumping into sleep, completely exhausted after a mere round. Sesshoumaru couldn't say he blamed her, slipping into a light doze soon after. He likely wouldn't sleep properly until after her heat cycle ended.

Until then, he would guard Kagome like the priceless treasure she truly was.

* * *

They'd continued a hazy cycle of waking and fucking for a few hours. In their downtime, they ate and cuddled before the fire. The heat cycle was in full effect now that Kagome had found an outlet. Even while they held one another, he could feel her hungry gaze roving over him for more. His cock twitched in response. He wasn't certain how it was possible. Surely he had nothing left.

Kagome stroked her hand over his abdomen, kissing and nuzzling at his neck. Lost in the dream-like stasis of afterglow, Sesshoumaru didn't realise his thoughts had taken a turn for the unwanted until he was there.

They couldn't mate. She needed to leave. Kagome had arrived with a goal: to return to her loved ones after mastering control of herself. A hard grip closed around his heart, clenching.

"When will you leave for your home?" He asked into the silent room.

Kagome stilled atop him, shifting. Her expression became complicated. "When I'm ready. Why? Are you pushing me out of the door?"

He shot her an innocent look as if to say _'who me? Never.'_

Kagome gave a quiet giggle, laying down atop him so that their stomachs met and chests pressed together. She flicked her ankles up into the air behind her and crossed them as she paused.

"I guess after I've perfected the transformation is a good time to tell. Then you'll know if I can be around people or not. As my mate, you'll pick up on that."

Sesshoumaru gave a tired, resigned smile. "Is it realistic to think that you can mate me and then leave for Tokyo?"

Distress briefly fanned through her scent, causing him to wince. It hurt. Kagome lifted her head, studying his ancient features for a long time.

"You're coming with me," Kagome decided.

"What?"

"Yep," she said brightly. "You're meeting my family, and staying by my side. It's the only thing for it."

Sesshoumaru worked his mouth, trying to articulate something, but it was forever lost as she held his face. Soft palms glided over striped cheeks, her gaze intent.

"I'm not leaving you here alone," she murmured. "You weren't just some ticket to control that I'll discard after you're useful. I'm serious about mating you."

"How can you be, considering how long we've truly known each other?"

Kagome snorted and straightened, crossing her arms over her chest. A pity, he thought. "Instinct, of course. Sometimes I think I'm more demon than you are- or you're more human than I am."

Sesshoumaru blinked and slowly tensed. He growled, hair moved by a phantom breeze. "What did you just say?"

"You heard me loud and clear. Or is your hearing becoming poor like a human's too?" Kagome teased.

She yelped a cry of surprise when she tumbled down to the furs. Sesshoumaru's teeth were inches from her face, fanning a rumbling snarl over parted lips.

"You know not what you do by desiring I return to instincts."

Kagome only drew him closer, heedless of the danger, yet aware of it. Her gaze was steady. "You'll be able to feel things more keenly than you do now. You shut them out on purpose, didn't you? It must have been painful…wanting pack. Only a human could live out here in the mountains for so long. So that's what you became."

His kissed his throat tenderly and he thought he might lose it. Become insane and whimper and keen at her feet. By the God's she touched him so reverently. He'd long desired someone do so exactly the way she was, stroking her thumbs down tense arms to the insides of his wrists.

"Don't push me away again, Sesshoumaru," she murmured. "Leaving for Tokyo is my decision to make, not yours. Besides, we both know you couldn't get rid of me even if you tried."

The cheeky grin she shot him wasn't quite convincing when her eyes dropped to the side self consciously. She could only endure so much. He'd lose her if he kept stumbling. Human logic didn't belong there with them.

Sesshoumaru wrapped his arms around her and inhaled her hair. "You're mine," he said into her ear.

"Yes," the word rolled out as a purr.

"I cannot promise you will like this one if I become more instinctual."

She shivered with delight. "I think I will," she touched his forehead, brushing pale bangs aside. "You still accepted me, despite how my form changed."

Sesshoumaru hummed and dragged his nose against hers, licking her bottom lip and kissing Kagome with languid brushes of his tongue- before biting her bottom lip. She squeaked and flushed red. Giving a devilish smirk, Sesshoumaru lost himself in shedding his restrained countenance. Needless to say, the cabin shook a little on the mountainside. Hoarse cries caused what few birds remaining to scatter. The Killing Perfection was reborn into something new. There were no wars to fight or lands to claim, but there was a woman worthy of being his mate at his side. She'd stay, and teach him how to run again where he'd been walking, how to see the world in colour where there'd been muted shades of black and white before.

Sesshoumaru smiled and anticipated it eagerly. Anticipated something that wasn't just the cycle of food, sleeping, or the impersonal warmth of a fire. Kagome would stay, and he'd be glad of it.


	6. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: werewolf smut
> 
> AN: Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!

In the months that followed, they practised every day. Kagome gained confidence, transforming during the day without the use of a moon. Even on the nights of the full moon, transformation proved a less painful and traumatic experience. Sesshoumaru suspected it was tied to her state of mind regarding her 'curse.' The second she began thinking of it as something to be embraced, her body stopped resisting the change- and she'd bloom into a maned wolf with finesse and ease. Nonetheless, Kagome remained wary of staying in her wolf form for more than an hour. They had no proof, but she'd come to reflect on her sire's demise as a warning. Perhaps he'd been a normal man once. Maybe he'd started out just like her, and then lost himself in transformation: fell too far into the animal state he could not return to being human.

Therefore, Kagome straddled the line between her natures. She embraced both sides of herself without giving either complete dominance. She was simply…Kagome.

As for himself, Sesshoumaru began to ease more into verbalising what had happened in the past. He shared past horrors but could also paint a picture of what life had been like centuries ago in its happier times. He'd forgotten those lighter moments but Kagome could worm them out of his memories and he'd be glad of it.

Sesshoumaru watched her walk towards the mountain trail clad in his silks. Glancing over one shoulder, she smiled impishly, before taking off into a run. Heat stirred his blood and Sesshoumaru shuddered. He then pushed off the ground in hot pursuit.

Shrieks of excitement bounced off the summer trees. Her bare footprints crushed into the dirt began to elongate and change. Sesshoumaru pumped his legs, raising bright, burning eyes to the woman as she dove ahead into a crouch and changed. Rippling black fur smoothed over her head like a cloak- spilling down long gangly limbs and flushing a tail out behind her. The werewolf continued running, glancing at him and yipping her surprise at his proximity.

He could almost keep up with her now. Sesshoumaru smirked and followed suit, letting youki enclose his form. Bursting free of red flames a moment later, the white dog demon fell into step beside her.

Kagome regarded him with glittering blue eyes. _'Did you see? I can transform perfectly now.'_

 _'I noticed.'_ Where else would he look if she was in view?

Her features managed to look smug as she tilted her jaw up, paws thundering across the earth as they weaved around tall trees. ' _You can keep up with me now too.'_

_'I can do more than that. I will beat you to the cave,'_ Sesshoumaru suddenly bolted ahead, forcing power into his legs.

Kagome let out a noise behind him and from the sound of things seemed to be hot on his heels.

His heart thundered loud and powerful in his chest. Fluffy ears bounced into the breeze, tail sailing and tongue lolling out.

_Alive._

He was alive.

He could feel everything so much keener. And right there with him was her scent. Bright, sweet and strong. Sesshoumaru inhaled it until his lungs ached. He felt the need to voice such a feeling. Like a bomb of rapture needed to detonate in his chest. He threw his head back and let the inferno spill up his throat, bursting out as a bellowing howl.

Kagome brushed up beside him in her gallop, black fur sliding intimately against snowy white. She joined him in song, her own howl matching his in volume but pretty in its drawl.

Sesshoumaru dropped his head and bumped noses with her, licking her muzzle. Kagome nuzzled against him in return, nipping his ear. This sufficiently distracted him enough for the werewolf to race ahead with a victorious yip.

Letting out a deep bark, he cut his eyes to the sky and pursued.

In the end, both quite forgot about their race. After reaching a remote cave and panting wildly together, they took to sitting on the slab of smooth warmed rock outside the entrance, Kagome lazing down as he licked at her face.

The sunlight bathed midnight blue fur into shades of brown. Her eyes remained nebulous, drawing him in.

Sesshoumaru blinked when she sat up and padded into the shadows of the cave.

"I transformed perfectly, right? I can maintain my shape pretty well," came her melodious human voice from the shadows.

He followed, making a noise of affirmation. His claws clicked on the stone surface, eyes adjusting to the dim light. His nose bumped her stomach once inside, looking at her.

Kagome smiled and held his canine face between her hands, smoothing gentle fingers over his muzzle.

"Then, you remember our terms?"

Sesshoumaru's gaze darkened. He nodded slightly, and Kagome stepped away allowing him to transform back.

Their lips met, and the world fell away.

Clothes were tugged loose, baring flesh. Hands strayed, cupping and caressing lovingly. Her tongue, lightly running over his pectorals, felt like heated dew. He ran the tip of his own along her chest and then made a slow, broad lick across a hardening nipple. Kagome stiffened, a deep moan rolling out of her as she arched against him. He felt lithe fingers wrap around his cock and he nearly bit down on her sensitive breast. She slid a needy hand from base to tip, stroking a thumb over the head. He hissed between his teeth and jerked in her hold. Kagome smiled like a vixen, and it was all too much.

She began to undo him with well-placed kisses and the graze of teeth and tongue over his broad shoulders and chest. His tapered waist flushed with goosebumps when Kagome nipped him there, stroking him languidly all the while. Sesshoumaru bucked into her palm a few times before snarling and finally shoving the tease to the floor. Their forms shifted without either really acknowledging it.

Fur glided over skin, teeth knocking, growls and whines entwining.

Instinct to mate took over and everything tilted on its axis as the pale inuyoukai and black-furred wolf nuzzled and licked at one another.

In typical lordosis behaviour, she lifted her hips into the air until her back was sharply arched, sinking into the instinctual pose with her upper half lowering. Kagome shifted her legs further apart until she was presented to him, panting.

The feeling of his weight on her made the werewolf hum with satisfaction. A croon rumbled from his throat and Sesshoumaru licked and nuzzled at the back of her head before they began.

It was a testament to her control and complete mastery of instincts that Kagome didn't reject the unfamiliarity of the situation. But he could see it in her eyes when she tilted her head to glance at him. She was there- with him. Nothing else mattered, not even the forms they took.

 _Mine, mine, mine_ , his heart sang. He was going to bite her. He was finally going to join with Kagome and take her as a mate.

Thinking about it made his blood hum.

He pulled back and thrust deep inside her again and again. Hard and fast. He groaned low in the back of his throat each time she clenched around him. She pushed her hips back to meet him, and whimpered and panted under him.

' _I'm yours!-'_ her cries confirmed it.

Noticing hand-like paws digging their claws deep into the earth as she trembled, Sesshoumaru continued nuzzling the back of her head. Adjusting his form- a front paw shifted and morphed, until it reached and covered her own, lacing their monstrous fingers. Then his hips jerked spasmodically as he started to come.

There wasn't even a sensation of orgasming, merely a blaze of whiteness as though the world momentarily bled away as the intensity of his climax struck him like a heated blade. Pearly white teeth sank into her neck until he tasted blood, pouring youki into the bite that shot through her bloodstream. Kagome screamed and jerked, so he tightened his hold, the youki flowing through him into her body and lacing their aura's together. When he recovered enough to formulate thought again, he was still orgasming. On and on. Kagome hadn't stopped wailing, her body seized around him, taking the mating mark.

When it was finally over, his knot prevented him from shifting off her immediately. Kagome tilted her neck to one side, and he helpfully removed his teeth to start lapping at the wound. He made low noises of apology, nuzzling. She huffed in response, paw-like fingers squeezing around his own.

The second the swelling died down and he pulled out of her, Kagome shifted forms and shoved him down, blue eyes hard. "Now it's my turn. If you get a mark, then I get one too. I think that's fair."

Blazing red wind whipped her hair back as Sesshoumaru lay beneath her in his humanoid form once more, looking sated and lazy while the beautiful woman straddled him. "It is traditional for the male to claim the female. I apologise if it hurt," he hummed.

"It killed," Kagome grit out, stilling when he lifted a hand to brush a palm against the wound on her nape. Sesshoumaru let out a comforting noise and sat up to graze his tongue over it. She shivered in his arms as they slid around her waist gently. "Besides," she said quietly, lifting her head to press a possessive kiss to his skin. "You're mine too," she said against his throat, sighing. "I've definitely become weird over these past few months because all I'm thinking about is everyone in Tokyo seeing my mark on your neck when we walk through the streets together."

"You intend to put it in such an obvious place where everyone may see? You certainly are possessive, woman," he teased, licking the mark and languidly beginning to palm her breast. She arched against him, tangling her fingers in silver hair as she ground her hips into his slowly, new smells of arousal betraying her eagerness for round two. He moaned against her neck and gripped her waist harder.

"Well, I learned by example," Kagome gave a small giggle. Cradling his face in her hands, she shifted and pressed her lips to his.

Sesshoumaru held her closer, flesh pressing against slick, bare flesh, sighing against her mouth.

"I can feel you so much keener than before," she mumbled. "Are you…happy? You feel happy."

"Hn," Sesshoumaru rested his forehead against hers with half-lidded eyes. To think he'd tried to force her to leave in those early days. Tried to resist the magnetism of her personality that drew him in like a moth to a flame. Power called to power. They'd licked each other's wounds and could call themselves equals. That solitary Halloween night seemed so far away now.

"I am happier…than I thought possible," he uttered, sensing it when her own joy bubbled to the surface. "Such emotions felt beyond my reach, so this one thought of them as a vapid indulgence to starve away the desire for company."

"Edgy," Kagome smirked, stroking a thumb over the shell of his pointed ear. "You don't have to think that way anymore or punish yourself for feeling it. We'll have more company too, in the future."

The former warlord gentled and slid a hand over her stomach, before pressing a long kiss to her lips.

Change was a funny thing. It could happen slowly and insidiously, the type that could sneak up on someone and catch them off guard. And then there was sudden change. Death, danger and the shocking discovery of feelings that hadn't been present before.

Sesshoumaru wasn't sure which category Kagome's presence in his life had fallen into. He'd long thought himself too jaded and too old to shake circumstances enough to enter a metamorphosis. Surely he would always be the widowed former lord sitting alone by the fire in the lonely mountains?

But there would come a time, not many days after, when they'd leave his cabin for Tokyo. The city air would choke his lungs and blinding lights would sting sensitive eyes, and worse still the sight of her family drawing closer on the shrine grounds would fill him with a sense of imposter syndrome- but Kagome's grip remained steady. His hand would stay locked in hers. When she looked at him and tearfully smiled, Sesshoumaru willingly pushed aside all that he'd been-

-and changed.

* * *

One Halloween night, Sesshoumaru stood in the threshold to a small room. A blue light showing a happy moon and sun rolled around the walls, passing over his face- coming from a slowly twirling nightlight near the crib.

It had been three weeks. Three long weeks listening to loud wails, feeling Kagome's aches, sores and tiredness. Three weeks of drowning under the weight of his own uselessness for not being able to help overly much.

This was something people didn't talk about often when celebrating growth. The slip back. The regression and stumble. Kagome giving birth to their child was his stumble.

Because Sesshoumaru couldn't bring himself to touch him.

Their son stirred again, whining. Sesshoumaru's eyes flickered as the humanoid looking baby started kicking at the covers, fussing.

"Cease this," he rumbled, walking to the crib. "Your mother fed you not long ago and I know for a fact there is nothing in your diaper. She is tired. Do not wake her."

Apparently logic didn't fly too well with their son, who blinked baby blue eyes and stared up at him- starting to cry.

Sesshoumaru grit his teeth, looking around helplessly. Kagome was sleeping in their room not too far away, exhausted. Extending a hand, the demon rumbled, trying to calm his pup. It did nothing, his son only getting more worked up the longer he delayed comforting him.

Taking deep, steadying breaths, wintery lashes squeezed shut. The afterimage of an ashen body burned behind his eyes, but Sesshoumaru reached down blindly despite this. He couldn't keep putting it off. Horror gripped his throat as his palm met something warm, fingers gingerly petting soft, short white hair. His stomach buckled, but he did not tear himself away as he would before. Exhaling shakily, Sesshoumaru opened his eyes and forced himself to slide his hands beneath the pup, lifting him out and supporting his weight.

He felt surreal.

Heart thundering, Sesshoumaru stared. His son quieted and stared back, gazing up at him like his father were an amazing work of art. He didn't feel brittle to the touch, nor did his warm tiny body break and crumble into nothingness like little Koji.

Sesshoumaru didn't realise how hard he'd started breathing before a hand lay over his arm.

Kagome brushed up against his side, tears in her eyes. She drew up on tiptoe and kissed the sweat beading upon his brow. "It's alright," she murmured, stroking her mate's arm. "See? He's okay? You won't hurt him."

She'd been so patient. Sesshoumaru swallowed, resting his chin on her head briefly and exhaling. He was truly blessed to have such an understanding mate. Their son made a squeaking nose, tiny hands patting his chest. Sesshoumaru blinked down at the boy as he transformed- a snowy white pup with triangular ears now licking at his hand.

"He likes you," Kagome giggled softly.

"Hn...forgive me for-"

"Don't apologise," she said firmly, before gentling and resting her head against his shoulder. "No one's ever really free from the past. I still have nightmares about Hojo, and sometimes I wonder if I should've actually committed to seeing his parents like I said I would. But...we can't let bad memories ruin the present, right? Otherwise, we miss the good things happening right in front of us."

Sesshoumaru gazed at his son. Giving a slight nod, he inclined his head, leaning down and brushing a regal nose against the white fur of the pup's forehead where a crescent moon lay- inhaling his baby smell and recognising that this was his flesh and blood. This tiny life was alive. He couldn't keep mistaking him for a ghost, lest he miss out on everything he'd built with them. His son yipped and gummed at his chin.

Kagome stifled a giggle behind her hand as Sesshoumaru straightened with slobber on his face. She wiped it away, spying his mildly amused expression.

"What should we name him?" she asked softly. "Did you finally settle on one?"

Raising warm golden eyes to the nursery window, he picked up on small flecks spiralling outside. They fell like pretty white confetti, beautiful and silent. He could hear the distant shouts of children in their neighbourhood squealing at the first snowfall of the year.

"Yuki," he muttered, looking down at their now dozing son. "Yuki. I will think of him as cleansing snow...not as ash."

Kagome's brows drew together and she leaned up, cupping a striped cheek and kissing him tenderly, reverently. He leaned against the comfort she naturally exuded, so safe and secure. It was never a failure on Kagome's part that he'd slip and remember the past sometimes. He couldn't have asked for a better woman.

She crooned softly, wrapping him up in a loving hug- which was rudely interrupted by some banging on the door.

Sesshoumaru surfaced from his melancholy to huff and groan, annoyance painting his features. "Those brats. Have they not had enough candy for one night?"

"Gah! We ran out of sweets earlier too...what should we give them?"

"Fruit."

"You can't give kids fruit on Halloween!"

Leaning down, he carefully tucked Yuki back into his crib, smoothing a careful, loving hand over fluffy white hair that had returned. Straightening, he wrapped an arm around his wife's waist, sighing and walking from the room with her.

"Money?"

"I don't know if their parents would appreciate that, honey."

"Fine- we open the door as our transformed selves. That will scare the little pests off for good."

"Ohhh my God, you're so evil," Kagome paused, grinning wickedly. "Let's do it."

* * *

_End_


End file.
